Is it normal to wonder what it'd be like. . .

sonknuck23

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I've been thinking a lot lately about what life would be like without my girlfriend, and I'm just wondering if this is just a normal phase? or is this the kind of thing people usually only think about when they're unhappy and want out? Just wondering what you guys think of this, and if it's normal or not, or maybe if it's even happened to some of you.
 

smile72

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I've never had a boyfriend, but I guess it's as normal as checking other guys/girls out. But if your not happy I advise you to get out of the relationship now.
 

Crimsonclaw111

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If you're thinking about it all the time, maybe you have depression, assuming the thoughts make you sad. If not, then it's time to move on.
I happen to have thoughts similar to that from time to time; I believe it's a thought process that allows you to analyze exactly how attached you are to someone or something. If you love something, you can't help but think of losing it as well. It's a sad but true fact, or at least to me it is.
 

Thesolcity

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Maybe you're sub-consciously testing if you are actually happy with this person. Seems normal, if you are sad when they are gone, you've probably found a keeper.
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Slyakin

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A better question would be if you never had a boyfriend/girlfriend at all. I fall under this scenario for family (religious) reasons.

It's just kind of vague, to be honest. I think that relationships at school levels are just... stupid. It makes me sound like a really sad hermit, but think about it:

You meet a girl.
You start going out.
You break up.
Repeat.

It doesn't really lead anywhere. As for relationships like these leading to marriages... Those don't normally last long.

The emotions that you feel in a shallow relationship like that won't compare when you REALLY get to learn about someone. Getting to understand the "spouse" really just tightens a relation than just asking the person out of nowhere.
 

marcus134

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It's a normal phase, you're just back to earth.
Now you just have to take your time and see who she really is and ponder whether she is the kind of person you'd want to spend 10 or 20 years with her or not.
It can take several weeks to go through this.
 

Edgedancer

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I will be honest, I do think about it sometimes as having a girlfriend does complicate things somewhat. I never go so far as to think about being with another person but I just wonder how I would react to being single after a relationship. I wonder if I would go off the deep end and be miserable, be happy or go out and have a rebound relationship. So I personally think its normal because its what I do, but I have found that I am not exactly the best person to give relationship advice.
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sonknuck23

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I appreciate all of your posts and the fact that you've all been nice about it. I love my girlfriend, we have a good time and etc. To be more thorough, I live with her, and I just feel like things were better before we moved in together. . . I moved in rather quickly due to certain circumstances, but I wish I just had my own place and we could be a normal "teenage" couple (we're both 20, but we just turned 20, so yeah, I use the world "teenage" loosely, but you know what I mean.)
 

Sebastian

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sonknuck23 said:
I appreciate all of your posts and the fact that you've all been nice about it. I love my girlfriend, we have a good time and etc. To be more thorough, I live with her, and I just feel like things were better before we moved in together. . . I moved in rather quickly due to certain circumstances, but I wish I just had my own place and we could be a normal "teenage" couple (we're both 20, but we just turned 20, so yeah, I use the world "teenage" loosely, but you know what I mean.)
Best wishes...Ur happy continuously....
 

SamAsh07

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These thoughts are normal. Even I had them last year with my love, the only reason for that was "feeling worried about losing her". Now engaged so that worry is gone.
 

Shinigami357

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FFS... You nitwits should consider yaselves lucky there's one person who cares enough to tolerate all yer BS, despite not being blood-related. Considering how many people out there that are wondering how it would be like to have a GF/BF, it's kind of astounding that people can consider thinking about that. Though props to you if you never acted on it.

Though I guess you can chalk that up to human psychology, always thinking "what if?" and all that other load of bull. Just don't go off doing stuff on a whim.
 

Sterling

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IMO, it's good to have thoughts like these. It helps you think about issues that you need to talk about. If these thought are about sex and other fantasies, I'm sure it's just a phase.

It's a way of sorting out your feelings, and letting you know that you need to find a way to keep your relationship interesting and healthy.
 

koimayeul

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dont worry it is normal and healthy to put yourself and your relationship in questions

its when you dont that shit happens, keep on thinking and communicating with you gf is key, trust me!!
 

Edgedancer

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Shinigami357 said:
FFS... You nitwits should consider yaselves lucky there's one person who cares enough to tolerate all yer BS, despite not being blood-related. Considering how many people out there that are wondering how it would be like to have a GF/BF, it's kind of astounding that people can consider thinking about that. Though props to you if you never acted on it.

Though I guess you can chalk that up to human psychology, always thinking "what if?" and all that other load of bull. Just don't go off doing stuff on a whim.
What is your problem mate? Are you saying that we don't value our significant others? Because its actually the other way around. Most of us care about and wonder what would happen if we were no longer with them. I just dont get how this thought comes to someones mind at all.
 

Shinigami357

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Edgedancer said:
Shinigami357 said:
FFS... You nitwits should consider yaselves lucky there's one person who cares enough to tolerate all yer BS, despite not being blood-related. Considering how many people out there that are wondering how it would be like to have a GF/BF, it's kind of astounding that people can consider thinking about that. Though props to you if you never acted on it.

Though I guess you can chalk that up to human psychology, always thinking "what if?" and all that other load of bull. Just don't go off doing stuff on a whim.
What is your problem mate? Are you saying that we don't value our significant others? Because its actually the other way around. Most of us care about and wonder what would happen if we were no longer with them. I just dont get how this thought comes to someones mind at all.


All I'm saying is it sucks that some people think that. Nothing against any of you all, you prob scare the hell outta yourself when you think about that, but still. I mean, a lot of people are lonely, y'know? Like I said, as long as it stays as a hypothetical "what if" type of thing, then you're more-or-less normal (coz there really is no baseline for normal). Relax.

Of course, if you're in a bad spot relationship-wise, then I suppose it would be more than logical to harbor such thoughts.
 

mad567

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You see I had two girlfriends..
One of them really hurt my feelings.
So i decided not Have a relationship until I find a nice funny girl..
Until that time the only thing I do Is making out with random girls that I meet..
In Conclusion I can't imagine myself in a relationship
tongue.gif
 

koimayeul

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mad567 said:
You see I had two girlfriends..
One of them really hurt my feelings.
So i decided not Have a relationship until I find a nice funny girl..
Until that time the only thing I do Is making out with random girls that I meet..
In Conclusion I can't imagine myself in a relationship
tongue.gif
i say good POV!! be careful with careless bitches hurting ur feelings..
frown.gif
 

Edgedancer

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Shinigami357 said:
Edgedancer said:
Shinigami357 said:
FFS... You nitwits should consider yaselves lucky there's one person who cares enough to tolerate all yer BS, despite not being blood-related. Considering how many people out there that are wondering how it would be like to have a GF/BF, it's kind of astounding that people can consider thinking about that. Though props to you if you never acted on it.

Though I guess you can chalk that up to human psychology, always thinking "what if?" and all that other load of bull. Just don't go off doing stuff on a whim.
What is your problem mate? Are you saying that we don't value our significant others? Because its actually the other way around. Most of us care about and wonder what would happen if we were no longer with them. I just dont get how this thought comes to someones mind at all.


All I'm saying is it sucks that some people think that. Nothing against any of you all, you prob scare the hell outta yourself when you think about that, but still. I mean, a lot of people are lonely, y'know? Like I said, as long as it stays as a hypothetical "what if" type of thing, then you're more-or-less normal (coz there really is no baseline for normal). Relax.

Of course, if you're in a bad spot relationship-wise, then I suppose it would be more than logical to harbor such thoughts.
I am sorry. For some reason, now that I am a little tipsy, I realise that I was a little rude when I was sober, for whatever reason.
biggrin.gif

In my case at least, it is purely hypothetical as I am totally devoted to my girlfriend; and I do acknowledge that some people are lonely, in terms of relationships, but I believe that there are people for everyone, and the people in their teens (and I know that I am still 19 so don't comment
tongue.gif
) often overvalue what a girlfriend/boyfriend means, seeing it as more of a status symbol, rather than a commitment.
 

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