Imbecile Lodges Himself In Storm Drain Chasing Lost Phone

Discussion in 'User Submitted News' started by SamAsh07, Jul 25, 2011.

  1. SamAsh07
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    Member SamAsh07 GBAtemp Addict

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    [youtube]HJgvnxn1dXk[/youtube]​

    Jared was just minding his own business, when he claims he was attacked by a roving gang, who pummeled the shit out of him and threw his phone down a storm drain. So he went in after it.

    One of the pivotal questions in this marvelously reported dispatch is, of course, Jared, were you drunk? He says no. Although he "woke up confused," he claims he was just high on life and perhaps some brain hemorrhaging when he dove into the small manhole looking for the phone, which must have been made out of god damn gold and moon dust, instead of, oh I don't know, seeking medical attention and calling the cops.

    But his bravery paid off! Oh wait, no, he was just stuck, ass in the air, with his legs kicking, as neighbors gawked and laughed. For forty minutes. Onlookers were captivated: "I can see these feet dangling in the drain, and I was like, what?"

    Like, what, indeed.

    If you watch one thing this year, let it not be the birth of your first child, but rather FOX 40 reporter Tihanna McCleese trying to reenact the phone-dive: "Yep, that's how he got in."

    This would have been the sext opportunity of a lifetime, Jared, but unfortunately you were too busy bleeding and flailing for romance. Pity.[/p]

    [​IMG] Source

    [​IMG] Original Source

    I wonder what kinda phone it was LOL, iPhone?? Android? Not a Nokia for sure.

    In other news: Skyward Sword doesn't feature Ganon, a new rival this time.
     


  2. _Chaz_

    Member _Chaz_ GBAtemp's Official Mook™

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    He really needs to get his mind out of the gutter.
     
  3. Tonitonichopchop

    Member Tonitonichopchop GBAtemp Maniac

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    I love how the reporter demonstrated how he entered the manhole. Very informative.
     
  4. Ikki

    Member Ikki GBATemp's grumpy panda.

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    Why are those called manholes?
    It sounds wrong.
     
  5. skawo96

    Member skawo96 GBAtemp Advanced Maniac

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    I love how she was like...'I wonder how he got in, the diameter is very small...' *gets in with no problems*
     
  6. thela_kid

    Member thela_kid GBAtemp Regular

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    this!

    i was like "oh.. ha he got stuck. what's she doing... why is she lifting it? o.O why is she on her stomach. wtf, she's in the stormdrain. now she's stuck xD"
     
  7. MigueelDnd

    Member MigueelDnd GBAtemp Fan

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    I laughed at the title, this kind of news are always unexpected and weird... althought I don't get why did the reporter "recreated" how the man got into the manhole... is that normal?

    I'm wondering the same thing.
     
  8. Hydreigon

    Member Hydreigon Isn't that DELICIOUS!?

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    Lol. Awesome neighbors. [​IMG]
     
  9. Tonitonichopchop

    Member Tonitonichopchop GBAtemp Maniac

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    It's called a manhole because it's a man sized hole (As this man has clearly displayed). It does sound a bit off though.
     
  10. SamAsh07
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    Member SamAsh07 GBAtemp Addict

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    Awesome is right LOL! A man is stuck in a drain and all people are doing is laughing and taking pictures (I'm definitely sure some people took) of him!! [​IMG]

    Maybe they thought "Oh he's just sight-seeing"
     
  11. omgpwn666

    Member omgpwn666 Guy gamer and proud!

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    I thought the news lady was gonna get stuck. She was showing how far into the drain she could get, thought she would've been like, "What the hell... how did he fit in here? *slides a little deeper in* Ohhh... that's how he did it".
     
  12. Aeladya

    Member Aeladya *mistressOFtheCLOW

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    Well it is understandable why he went in after the phone. If I had head injuries I probably wouldn't be thinking straight and I would go after the phone too instead of asking neighbors for help. Had he not had the injuries so severe he probably would have asked someone to call 911 instead of diving in after his phone.
     
  13. SamAsh07
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    Member SamAsh07 GBAtemp Addict

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    Well not everyone is the same dude, if I was attacked like this, I wouldn't bother about the phone but my own injuries, electronic devices should never be put ahead of your own personal state. The most reasonable thing the guy could do was go to a nearby neighbours house and ask for help. Screw the phone, it's gone down the drain, even if he were to find it deep in the drain (which is near to impossible), what would be the chances of it functioning at all?? Nowadays dropping phones is also a threat, gone are the days of Nokia phones that would still function even if they fell from a building.

    He really is an Imbecile, just like the topic title suggested.
     
  14. ThePowerOutage

    Member ThePowerOutage The Lord of the Flyes

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    ...calling the cops.[/p]

    How exactly?
     
  15. omgpwn666

    Member omgpwn666 Guy gamer and proud!

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  16. epicCreations.or

    Member epicCreations.or GBAtemp Fan

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    ...
    [​IMG]
     
  17. SamAsh07
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    Member SamAsh07 GBAtemp Addict

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    Lolol isn't it obvious? Ask a passerby to lend his phone? Go to a nearby neighbours house?? Find a Phone Booth?

    he claims he was just high on life and perhaps some brain hemorrhaging when he dove into the small manhole looking for the phone.........-snip......instead of, oh I don't know, seeking medical attention and calling the cops.[/p]

    Notice instead of [​IMG]
     
  18. Veho

    Global Moderator Veho The man who cried "Ni".

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    Being drunk or high or actually concussed, he probably wasn't thinking all that clearly.

    -brain hurt
    -must call 911
    -need phone to call 911
    -phone down drain
    -must fetch phone

    Asking a neighbor or passerby for help was thinking way outside the box.
     
  19. Presto99

    Member Presto99 You slammin, bro?

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    Well I guess it does look like he got beat up, which is sad, but the rest of this is hilarious! He dove in a filthy man-hole to get his phone, which had probably even stopped working by then due to the liquid, and got stuck, flailing his legs. [​IMG]
    Then the reporter was like, "This man-hole is heavy! *somehow moves it outta the way* I wonder how he got in here... *lays down* I can fit my head and arms in here... *wiggles in further* oh, now I got my shoulders past it... *gets out* and that's how he did it!"

    I would have died laughing if she fell in all the way! [​IMG]
     
  20. Ace

    Member Ace GBATemp's Patrick Bateman

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    Dat ass when she lies down. [​IMG]
    Ontopic: This is pretty hilarious. Although if he fell in, it would've probably been worse and dramatic.
     

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