How to tick people off

Ferrariman

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Found this on the net.


HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

From art lung

Do you have more, punk?
 

noisound

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lol i do #21 and 22 all the time. i've been put on with the horrible impression that typing with proper grammar is annoying, snotty, and uptight ! too much online games.. :wtf:

now im on forums a lot and like both improper and proper typing !

@awdofgum
true on that one ;P
 

Twiffles

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Have you tried staring at them (really only works with real people face-to-face). Just stare at them, when they glance at you to check if you're still staring, keep staring. Eventually they cave and ask you to stop, in one way or another.
 

xcalibur

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Twiffles said:
Have you tried staring at them (really only works with real people face-to-face). Just stare at them, when they glance at you to check if you're still staring, keep staring. Eventually they cave and ask you to stop, in one way or another.

Try doing that on the bus with little kids.
If you keep at it long enough they cry
rofl2.gif
 

Bob Evil

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If you are having sex with someone who annoys you ... many of us do ... sex with people who you don 't like is often really good
wink.gif
... anyway ... to annoy a sexual partner, if they are female lol, all you have to do is call them Steve or Mike or Dave, during sex lol

Another one I used, during sex, cos the girl was really annoying, was, the moment she started vocalizing her orgasms, was to stop, stare at her, and criticize her for not having the decency to wait for me
biggrin.gif
 

tinymonkeyt

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uhh stare a little bit to the side of their face when your talking to them
or at their forehead (anyone watched the office episode?)
 

Anakir

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ferrariman said:
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.

Did number 5. My friend got really pissed off. And number 6, I lol'ed. I can imagine my professor giving me an instant fail.
 

distorted.freque

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Twiffles said:
Have you tried staring at them (really only works with real people face-to-face). Just stare at them, when they glance at you to check if you're still staring, keep staring. Eventually they cave and ask you to stop, in one way or another.

I actually do that a lot.
smile.gif
What's even better is if you stare at them and slowly smile. More creepy than annoying though.
 

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