Green text stories

Status
Not open for further replies.

BORTZ

DO NOT SCREENSHOT
OP
Supervisor
Joined
Dec 2, 2007
Messages
13,236
Trophies
3
Age
34
Location
Pittsburgh
XP
15,861
Country
United States
Lhu0N.jpg

>Be 17
>at girlfriends house
>We are alone
>im sporting a cock rocket
>Shes on her period
>I ask if i can get her in the butt
>She finally agrees after some begging and pleading
>I stick it in
>FUCK YEAH
>So i finish my business
>Pull out, too fast
>OHSHI-
>She shits all over the couch
>Shes SUPER embarassed
>Did i mention it was her parents WHITE couch?
>We franticly try to clean the couch
>We know we are dead
>Fuckmyass.jpg

Fast forward a few hours

>Her dad comes home
>Discovers couch
>Rages and asks what happened
>before i can speak up and take the heat, my gf covers for me
>BLAMES THE FUCKING FAMILY DOG
>Father seems to have calmed down

Few minutes later while we are watching tv, happily past the incident

>Hear the basement outside door open and close
>gunshot
>Dad shot the fucking dog
>mfw
 

BORTZ

DO NOT SCREENSHOT
OP
Supervisor
Joined
Dec 2, 2007
Messages
13,236
Trophies
3
Age
34
Location
Pittsburgh
XP
15,861
Country
United States
lol i know, im just trying to bring some sort of blood infusion of life into this dead corpse forum.
lol newfags
 

Tom Bombadildo

Dick, With Balls
Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
14,555
Trophies
2
Age
29
Location
I forgot
Website
POCKET.LIKEITS
XP
18,989
Country
United States
Alright alright I got one.

>Be 12 at friends house (also 12)
>Playing Runescape like a boss
>Friend: "Hey, wanna see something cool?"
>Me: "Uhh...sure"
>*Friend visits porn site*
>I stare at boobies
>I like boobies
>Friend: "Let me get to the good page!"
>Friend clicks BBW
>NOPE.AVI
>Me: "Uhhh...I have to leave now"
>Leave forever
>Never go back to his house
 

Tom Bombadildo

Dick, With Balls
Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
14,555
Trophies
2
Age
29
Location
I forgot
Website
POCKET.LIKEITS
XP
18,989
Country
United States
Another:

>Be 14, have 17 year old gf (also sisters friend lol)
>3 weeks into relationship, I want to fuck
>Her: "Let's do it in your sisters room! lolololol it'll be funny!"
>Me: "Uhh...ok"
>Stick penis into vagina
>Turns out to be as tight as a 600lb man's pectorals
>Me: "Uhh...I think someone's coming, we better stop"
>Break up a week later
>3 months ago from today
>She's pregnant
>Sawitcoming.jpg
 

Tom Bombadildo

Dick, With Balls
Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
14,555
Trophies
2
Age
29
Location
I forgot
Website
POCKET.LIKEITS
XP
18,989
Country
United States
Oh oh oh another

>Be 7
>Go to catholic school
>Have wooden playground structure
>Tiny space underneath one of the platforms
>Lay down there with 2 friends during spring time to look up girls skirts
>mfw we never got caught
>mfw I have no face
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Site & Scene News

Popular threads in this forum

General chit-chat
Help Users
  • YukiHomura @ YukiHomura:
    My grandpa in turkish: I didnt knew that you can buy food in a
  • YukiHomura @ YukiHomura:
    Buy food and go to toilet same time
  • reha @ reha:
    "aynı anda bir yerden hem yemek alınabileceğini hem de sıçılabileceğini
    bilmiyordum"
  • reha @ reha:
    wise words indeed
  • YukiHomura @ YukiHomura:
    Exactly that
  • reha @ reha:
    anyways... i think i'll just finish the studying as quickly as possible then go the sleep... i have school at 7:45am... (wish me luck) it was nice talking to you ma'am
  • reha @ reha:
    dont mind the grammar mistakes
  • YukiHomura @ YukiHomura:
    Good luck. I go sleep now
  • YukiHomura @ YukiHomura:
    Or in turkish Iyi Geceler
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    Game awards on now, live
  • Psionic Roshambo @ Psionic Roshambo:
    Hopefully Mario wins an award best plumber in video games or something
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    Wonder won one already
  • GalacticWarsHalloween2023 @ GalacticWarsHalloween2023:
    Ironmouse won content creator??? This is invalid and I won't accept how a VTuber would win TGA (I support Raylife, the company that eliminates vtubers, and I am the founder of the company)
    +1
  • K3N1 @ K3N1:
    Gta 6 already won 12 awards
    +1
  • Sicklyboy @ Sicklyboy:
    Think I'm finally gonna install my hwfly modchip on my Switch OLED soon
  • GalacticWarsHalloween2023 @ GalacticWarsHalloween2023:
    "Ironmouse, you're next! let's see if you can stop you evil kind."
  • Psionic Roshambo @ Psionic Roshambo:
    Hmmm Hyperscan was in the XBox 360/PS3/Wii generation.... I guess the Wii wasn't the weakest lol
  • GalacticWarsHalloween2023 @ GalacticWarsHalloween2023:
    Hyperscan The console that uses cards
    +2
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    cant believe that nickolodeon fighter game was nominated for best fighting game of the year. lol
  • K3N1 @ K3N1:
    Bring back arcade carts
  • FlareReZ @ FlareReZ:
    @K3N1, Hopefully lets not get the suicide battery in em.
  • K3N1 @ K3N1:
    I feel asleep to MJs song the girl is mine then I woke up like wait a minute mj how old was she
    +1
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    then you woke up to "beat it" :evil:
    BigOnYa @ BigOnYa: then you woke up to "beat it" :evil: