Coffee Beans In Danger of Extinction

Discussion in 'User Submitted News' started by Gahars, Nov 13, 2012.

Nov 13, 2012
  1. Gahars
    OP

    Member Gahars Bakayaro Banzai

    Joined:
    Aug 5, 2011
    Messages:
    10,254
    Location:
    New Jersey
    Country:
    United States
    If you're like most people, you probably start your day with a nice cup of joe (perhaps while reading the morning paper and enjoying a puff or on two on a pipe).

    Well, it looks like that could all change. If climate change continues, coffee beans may just become a thing of the past.

    [​IMG] CBC News

    According to one scientist/coffee addict, "We clearly have a lotto problems here." Please note that no one in the history of human civilization has ever spoken these words.

    A loss like this would be quite devastating. Not only have people come to rely upon coffee for an early morning (or late night) boost, but entire economies are built around the coffee trade. Once mighty franchises may buckle, and poorer nations like Ethiopia might lose what little income they had from such a calamity.

    Rising sea water and global temperatures evidently aren't enough to motivate massive reform. Maybe disappearing coffee will (star)buck the trend.

    TL;DR:
    Warning: Spoilers inside!
     


  2. Bladexdsl

    Member Bladexdsl ZOMG my posts...it's over 9000!!!

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2008
    Messages:
    14,355
    Location:
    Queensland
    Country:
    Australia
    2080 by that time we'll be able to make synthetic coffee beans
     
    Brian117 likes this.
  3. tenkai_2.0

    Newcomer tenkai_2.0 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 12, 2012
    Messages:
    42
    Country:
    United States
    ack noooo not my cappuccinos!
     
  4. Flame

    Member Flame Me > You

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2008
    Messages:
    3,412
    Country:
    its a conspiracy by Redbull...
     
    NahuelDS likes this.
  5. Frank Cadena

    Member Frank Cadena GBAtemp Fan

    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2009
    Messages:
    317
    Country:
    Brunei
    inb4 the 'We'll adapt' statements. I for one drink a cup a day and I become short tempered without a cup in the morning. That and a book to read before I go to bed.
     
  6. FAST6191

    Reporter FAST6191 Techromancer

    pip
    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2005
    Messages:
    21,738
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    If it comes to pass I hold nothing of value will have been lost (livelihoods of coffee bean growers aside).

    That said I did find the following amusing
     
    Qtis likes this.
  7. Qtis

    Member Qtis Grey Knight Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2010
    Messages:
    3,762
    Location:
    The Forge
    Country:
    Antarctica
    That could help if you didn't drink coffee for a while. Your body gets used to it :P

    On a more serious note, this affects pretty much all species. It's visible in the sense that more and more "tropical" plants are found more north than ever before. Hopefully something can be done before this happens though :3
     
  8. Eerpow

    Member Eerpow *swoosh*

    Joined:
    Sep 14, 2009
    Messages:
    2,069
    Location:
    ERROR!
    Country:
    Sweden
    I have no idea why so many people drink coffee, I never could get into that stuff, it's horrible no matter how you prepare it...
    Sure I'm only 19 but to be honest I doubt I'll ever like it.

    While 2080 is the year they predict the beans to disappear it's very likely we'll see some of the consequences of the higher coffee prices within only a couple of years from now if the coffee production continues to decrease at the same rate. Coffee being such a valuable import and export product worldwide have a huge economical impact on the the countries producing it.
     
  9. p1ngpong

    Supervisor p1ngpong Legit Boss Harold

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2008
    Messages:
    6,296
    Location:
    DS Scene
    Country:
    Croatia
    Just one of many scaremongering climate change stories I have noticed in the news this week.
     
  10. Frank Cadena

    Member Frank Cadena GBAtemp Fan

    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2009
    Messages:
    317
    Country:
    Brunei
    It's less about the coffee and more about the routine sadly. I hate it if it gets broken. It's a cup in the morning and a book before bed. Anything else can change just not those 2.

    On topic; I want to see a fight between Starbucks and Big Oil. Big Oil is kinda rooting for the ice caps to melt. Why? Because supposedly there's large oil reserves under there that can only be accessed if the ice melts. Then with the money they make they'll make large floating cities and charge people to live in them.
     
  11. Taleweaver

    Member Taleweaver Storywriter

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2009
    Messages:
    5,124
    Location:
    Belgium
    Country:
    Belgium
    So THAT's why everyone's nipping tea in Babylon 5? They forecasted the extinction of the coffee bean! :P


    @Frank Cadena: yeah...I'd guess that paying oil companies to live on their floating city is going to be quite a break in a daily routine.
     
    Gahars likes this.
  12. Fear Zoa

    Member Fear Zoa This... This is the world we live in

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2009
    Messages:
    1,437
    Location:
    Maryland
    Country:
    United States
    I'll be dead by 2080, my kids kids can deal with that shit.
    I don't even like coffee anyway, I'm more of a soda and tea person.
     
  13. frogboy

    Member frogboy lacking both style and grace

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2011
    Messages:
    2,249
    Country:
    United States
    Good thing I never got into coffee.
     
  14. zygie

    Member zygie GBAtemp Regular

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2009
    Messages:
    180
    Country:
    Philippines
    I've seen the article before. I love coffee for the sake of coffee, not because of habit or a quick caffeine fix, so I'll be sad if or when coffee becomes a rare commodity. I even have a bean-to-cup coffee machine, for lack of a better name, just to get the best out of every cup.
     
  15. The Real Jdbye

    Member The Real Jdbye D:

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2010
    Messages:
    8,582
    Location:
    Doing your mom
    Country:
    Norway
    I don't like the taste of coffee, I only drink it when I'm tired. Even if coffee beans are extincted there will still be guarana, so nothing to worry about for those that drink it for the effects, not the taste.
     
  16. DaggerV

    Member DaggerV Archmagi of the Emerald Moon

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2009
    Messages:
    932
    Country:
    United States
    It's a setup to drive up price, don't you people get it!


    First the cannucks's massive supply of maple syrup just so happens to disappear, and now, coffee beans are going extinct!


    It's a war on breakfast! WAKE UP HEATHENS! Micky D doesn't want you to start being healthy!












    /endtrollface
     
    omgpwn666 likes this.
  17. Crystal the Glaceon

    Member Crystal the Glaceon GBAtemp Inkling™ Squishies~

    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2009
    Messages:
    14,796
    Location:
    Inkopolis
    Country:
    Antarctica
    But I need my coffee, without my coffee I am a bitch in the morning and the rest of the day.

    In all seriousness, we need to do something this.
     
  18. Bladexdsl

    Member Bladexdsl ZOMG my posts...it's over 9000!!!

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2008
    Messages:
    14,355
    Location:
    Queensland
    Country:
    Australia
    upon seeing this starbucks increase their prices by 50% :creep:
     
    naved.islam14 likes this.
  19. omgpwn666

    Member omgpwn666 Guy gamer and proud!

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2008
    Messages:
    2,535
    Location:
    Florida
    Country:
    United States
    I don't care. If I play my cards right and try to drink coffee everyday before 2080 I should be dead by 2050.
     
  20. Engert

    Member Engert I love me

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2012
    Messages:
    887
    Location:
    Taxachusetts
    Country:
    United States
    Shame on you. Is this the legacy you want to leave to your children? Here you go son, I leave you minus ten million in debt? Have a great day? Do the right thing and give up your son to Angelina Jolie.
     
    DaggerV likes this.

Share This Page