Check English grammar

Discussion in 'General Off-Topic Chat' started by Daoism, Sep 24, 2006.

Sep 24, 2006

Check English grammar by Daoism at 12:36 PM (860 Views / 0 Likes) 4 replies

  1. Daoism
    OP

    Newcomer Daoism Newbie

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    Please Check my Grammar, since my grammar is not that good. Please help.
    Thanks Guys!!

    Part 1
    Welcome to the second issue of paradise: wish you could be here, a digital publication and paperback for tourism around world. Digital publication will be available in pdf format. Paradise Magazine will focus on travel guides, travel journal and snapshots. The first issue of this magazine launch was a very successful throughout August, people around the world picked up this new magazine with some fantastic comments and feedback.

    Travel Guides
    Each month I will search the best places for vacation. In this month, I’ve reviewed Bora Bora Island and Niagara falls. Bora Bora Island is one of the beautiful Islands in the world and Niagara falls is one of the hottest waterfalls in the world.

    Travel Journal
    In this month, minimoni send me her travel of Hawaii. Hawaii is one of the best paradises for friends and families to enjoy. Have your travel journal? Want to send me your travel journal? Details for sending them in are here http://ww.paradise.com/traveljournals.

    Snapshots
    4 of the best paradise photos, such as the Great Wall of China by Nazif Erbay in this month. Remember, I want your submissions for the future snapshots! Details for sending them in are here http://www.paradise.com/snapshots or on page 10 of this magazine.

    part 2

    Welcome to Bora Bora Island, the most incredibly beautiful island in the world, it also has the reputation of being expensive resort as well. This island is located in Leeward group of the Society Islands of French Polynesia. French Polynesia is made up of five groups of small islands, Marquesas, Tuamotus, Austral, Gambier and Society. Society divided into two parts, Windward (Tahiti and Moorea) and Leeward (Raiatea and Bora Bora).

    Bora Bora Island is surrounded in the centre of a lagoon and barrier reef. Since 2002, around 7,250 people live in this island and the island is protected by a ring of coral. The main attraction of Bora Bora Island is the calm and the crystal clear of the water. French and Tahitian are the two main languages that spoken, but most of them can communicates in English since Americans and Europeans are the most visitors.

    Bora Bora is a small island, therefore public transport are limited. Bicycles are recommended the alternative way for tourists. If you don’t like bicycles, you can always hire a car in the little town of Vaitape.

    There are two popular hotels, one is the three star Bora Bora Eden Beach which is located on the south east of the main island. The other one is the fire-star Bora Bora Pearl Beach resort. Both hotels powered with solar engery, recycling and autonomous water management. There are more than 50 bungalows in Bora Bora Island, many beaches, ocean views and gardens. Each has own little restaurant with mini bar surround them, you can either pay your meals on full-board, half-board and buy them when you there.

    part 3

    The Niagara Falls located on the border between Canadian (Toronto) and U.S. (Buffalo). This waterfall is the most powerful and beautiful waterfall in the world, with attracts more than 15 millions visitors each year. There are three separate waterfalls on the Niagara River, Horseshoe Falls (because of its shape) or Canadian Falls, American (Rainbow) Falls and Bridal Veil (Luna) Falls.

    Out of those three waterfalls, Canadian Falls and American Falls attract tourists the most. The Canadian Falls have high of 53 metres, with more than 168,000 cubic metres of water pour over the crest per minute. The Canadian Falls is beautiful, scenic and is much better side than American Falls to view the falls. On the other side, American Falls have the height between 21 to 34 metres and with more than 14,000 cubic metress of water pour over the crest per minute. American side is not beautiful as the Canadian side, but this side has a lot of neon signs, mid range hotels and quickie marriage places. This side is good for honeymooners.

    The word Niagara means the “thunder of waters”, once you there you will easy to understand why they have that meaning. If you want to get close to the water, a Maid of the Mist tour is the only solution to get close to the water. Since 1864, the famous diesel-engine boats allow visitors around the world to experiences the close up to the base of the falls. They also provide raincoats, but you will still get wet since water is so massive.

    If you don’t like to get wet, you can take a tour in the Niagara Helicopters. The Niagara Heclicopters will fly around the Niagara River. You will see the real beauty of American Falls, Canadian Falls and the Luna Falls. The best thing about this fly is you can see rainbows come and go from all sort of directions.

    For a place to rest, Long Lake House is one of the best lake houses in Niagara Falls. The architectural is superb, nice dining area with fireplace and lovely views in the surrounding area such as Lake Ontario and Toronto Skyline.

    part 4

    Today is not my lucky day, my shin got cut it badly while taking photo. I was on my way to Hana, It was a long drive, but the scenery on the way there was so beautiful that I can not resist. Along the way I stopped at the gas station to fill my gas. I had my lunch there as well and decided to take some photos around this around. While taking photos, I slipped on some rocks and smashed my shin and got cut it pretty badly. I didn’t anything fun during the whole day, so sad. The beach in Hana is pretty nice, and the waves are huge. Wish I could swims in this nice beach… What a boring day today.

    11th of March 2006

    My shin is getting better now. I don’t feels hurt as much as yesterday. So I’ve decided to go to Haleakala area. Haleakala is the volcano on the eastern side of Maui. Sunrise at Haleakala is really romantic, I had to wake up early around 2 AM and leave about 3 AM. The journey is very long, it took me about 2.5 hours to make it there, but it’s worth it. People told me you should go to Haleakala when the first days you in Maui. You will find yourself up early because of the time zone changes. Maybe next time I should do that. Overall I really like the sunrise at Haleakala, it’s really nice. I feel a bit tired so I’ve decided to take a nap after seeing the sunrise. I got up around 12 PM, and see heaps of people riding bikes down and up to the Volcano path. Maybe next time I should ride a bike instead driving, I wonder how its feel like. The whole day, I pretty much spend touring around Haleakala and taking heaps of photos. Today its really fun for me, hopefully tomorrow will be fun as today.


    12th of March 2006

    Today I went and see the Humpback Whales. People told me whale season is from December until April, which means I am really lucky that I went during to Hawaii during the whale’s season. Everything in here is a little more expensive than other day because of Whale’s season is popular during this time of the year. I also want to mention the weather is really perfect this time of the year. Yeah, I know, it’s always tropical in Hawaii, but this is the best time of the year. That’s why everything here is expensive, but it’s worth it. People are so friendly here, warm weather, beautiful scenery… what a life. =)

    Around midday, I went to the Plantation House (Kapalua). I reckon is the best restaurant in Maui. Well the food here is obviously American and the prices are quite reasonable. My favourite food is the crab cakes. This place is very good for couples, the setting indoor and outdoor seating is so beautiful. A good place for sightseeing ocean.

    During the night, I went to my favourite beach and take a good rest there. The beach called the Big Beach, weird name huh? That’s what I thought too. Anyways, around the beach there are a lot of trees at the entrance, I go there and have some shade for like 2 hours. This is my second time here and also my favourite one because this beach isn’t very crowded then the other beach. Sometimes I just want a quite place to relax my mind. And guess what? There is also a beach called Little Beach, wow so many weird names in Hawaii. I’ve read about this beach and I’m not too sure where this beach is. Ah… I’m too lazy to search around. Big Beach is good enough for me.

    14th of March 2006

    Ah sweet Friday, Friday is always my favourite days during school time. The trip has begun and it's been breathtaking so far. Today I went to Hamana Bay and went snoring for the day, seen lots of colourful fish in transparent water and the beach was warm and crowed. I didn’t do anything much today. I just want to relax and enjoy the sun burn… well not really the sun burn but just want to get my skin a little tan =). Sunset is really beautiful in Hawaii. In the night, I pretty much spent the whole night in the ocean, it’s so warm. Heaps of people swims at night, the water is not cold at all. I wish I could live in Hawaii forever. Just love it here it’s been nice and fun. But it’s pity that I’m going back to Australia tomorrow! It is sad that I have to leave Hawaii so soon....
     
  2. Psyfira

    Member Psyfira Credit: 0ml. Insert tea to continue

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    Line 1: "paradise: wish you could be here" is a name, so the words should start with capitals.
    Line 2: travel journals
    Line 3: "around the" = throughout
    Line 4: "with some fantastic comments and feedback." the word "with" sounds weird. Not sure how to fix it
    All: "Niagara Falls" (falls is part of a name so should be capitalised)
    Line 5: "Each month I will search the best places for vacation" not quite sure what you mean by that.
    Line 6: "Bora Island is one of the [most] beautiful islands in the world "
    Line 6: the phrase "in the world" is used twice too close together. Change one [​IMG]
    Line 7: "send me her travel" makes no sense.

    I gotta go
     
  3. Daoism
    OP

    Newcomer Daoism Newbie

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    Thanks for the fast reply Psyfira.

    p.s. What do you guys think about the rest of the articles?
     
  4. lookout

    Member lookout GBAtemp Board Room

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    Line 1:"Welcome to the second issue of paradise: wish you could be here" = The second issue of Paradise Magazine: Wish you were here

    You really need to read some books, it help improve your grammar.

    I gotta go too
     
  5. Orc

    Member Orc ‎(ღ˘⌣˘ღ)

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    Actually lookout, you're the last person I would've thought of when it comes to grammar.
     

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