Good youtube machine with no adblock (DNS level things/stuff like pihole are great for general internet, tricky for youtube embedded things) , no download options and no https://sponsor.ajay.app/
and possibly no 2x speed (if not more)? Tough sell on that one, especially when various old computers are so cheap/easy.
On loud drives. I am not sure where Hitachis ended up in later years but back when there were firmwares that had lower read speeds and consequently less noise (less read speed = longer load times where DVD was at play as well). Such things were dropped on drive types I cared about, and then we got the fun with verification (earlier hacked firmwares had wave checks, which meant updates when new waves hit or you had to disable the checks by inserting a certain DVD each time). However XGD3 and some Hitachi stuff seemed minimal updates needed so some of the old stuff might still work at some level. Also if you are willing to play with jumping wires on hitachi stuff then you can do similar to send drive eject pulses on later things.