Becoming a REAL Pirate in the 21st Century

Discussion in 'General Off-Topic Chat' started by WeaponXxX, Mar 6, 2008.

  1. WeaponXxX
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    WeaponXxX Too F'in Blonde

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    Just curious here, but with technology being the way it is, well is there any way to be a full fledged pirate and NOT get your ship blown to fucking pieces right off the bat. I have some money to blow and I am thinking...what don't I have? And it hit me! A fucking pirate ship but of course I know there are still "pirates" out there but from what I understand it is like Cubans on a little boat who hijack another boat and kill the crew and steal all the cargo. There is nothing wrong with that I guess but I want a big ship with the flag to represent!! Sure stealing, raping, murdering, pillaging and plundering in this age are frowned upon...but with my Visa expiring in 2010 I really have no idea what to do or where to go....except the open seas....lol...or maybe starting an army

    Yes.... I am quite fucking insane...I know this...but then some people think Napoleon was also insane....hahahahahha
     


  2. Shinji

    Shinji ҉҉ ҉҉

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    first off, you need a stylish looking boat. what are we, savages? nay, PIRATES!!
    next, you'll need a crew as insane as you are. you can recruit everyone here at the 'temp [​IMG]
    lastly, WEAPONS!

    maybe a nice cap'ns quarters too [​IMG]
     
  3. WeaponXxX
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    WeaponXxX Too F'in Blonde

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    What a dilemma.... well first off ... the multi million dollar question at hand is ... sails or a motor ... we'd be needing a fast ship and while its fun to have the sails.... a very fast ship may be a bit more important than looks...as long as we can raise a flag...I think that is all that matters....

    This ship.... possibly out of my price range right now... but with a little hard work I may be able to pull it off by 2010 holds 46 crew members:
    [​IMG]

    Actually I misread the listing....this one may be more expensive:
    [​IMG]

    It has dual 720 hp engines plus 3 sails.... I have a small scarab now with a 502 which hauls ass....so this ship must be fucking fast....but the price has me very worrisome...fuck I'm gonna have to bust some ass...and sure I know what some are thinking...a pirate buying a boat...but I think in this day and age "commandeering" a ship would be damn near impossible as you'd have all sorts of marine armies ready to fuck you up. So therefore it'd be more like terror of the seas....let em know your out there yet leave no survivors to tell the tale (or describe your boat)
     
  4. Ace Gunman

    Ace Gunman ~••Lucky҉Shot••~

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    Who hasn't thought of being a pirate at one point or another? Unfortunately it's no longer swashbuckling and sword-play, now it's all machine guns and cruise boats. The whole draw of being a pirate has been corrupted by the modern age. Same goes for most of those fun old "professions". It's all fun and games as a knight or a cowboy until someone decides "Hey, why am I fighting you with a sword? I have a bazooka!".

    [​IMG]
     
  5. fischju

    fischju Rehabilitated Jaywalker

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    You DO know that the FBI are still watching you, right?
     
  6. WeaponXxX
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    WeaponXxX Too F'in Blonde

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    Well adapting to the 21st century lifestyle I'd understand if we'd need to pick up machine guns for pirate to pirate battles but if we take over freighters (possibly shipping over consoles and such [​IMG] or hijacking a nautical enthusiast boat, well I don't see why we can't use swords or any other weapons that strike our fancy...I think it would be the overwhelming number of armed pirates that would help in successfully winning the battle against non pirates. Oh an interesting question, I assume cannons are out so what are the options for ship to ship combat. I don't have access or connections to any rocket launchers or bazookas..is that what I'd need to acquire for this journey?

    Assuming they are watching me still, and I do assume that, there is no crime in wanting to commit a crime, nor is there a crime in buying a boat. That is not to say that if I bought a bought it wouldn't arise suspicion but as long as there is no survivors to tell any tales then the feds will have no ammunition to take any acts against me.
     
  7. lookout

    lookout GBAtemp Board Room

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    just buy a monkey pirate!

    [​IMG]
     
  8. CockroachMan

    CockroachMan Scribbling around GBATemp's kitchen.

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    I believe there are still pirates on China and south-east Asia.. but how was said, they use machine-guns and not swords any more [​IMG]

    Anyway.. can I join your crew? [​IMG]
     
  9. Javacat

    Javacat GBAtemp Fan

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    When you get your boat you need a rail gun mounting to it somewhere!


    Also, for the boat, I would go with the Sea Shadow!
    [​IMG]


    You'd have to go with stealth pirating though, and sneak up on people at night as it's not very fast [​IMG] That might work best for modern pirating though, rather than blasting in and getting blown out of the water.


    Edit: Maybe one of these would work better or maybe one of these. With the second one you could go in quite close, send a small boat out to go attack and then whilst they are all fighting away you could send in a helicopter full of more of your crew.
     
  10. Little

    Little I r Little

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    You must definitely most certainly wear black eye liner pirates of the Caribbean style. okay.
     
  11. Moots

    Moots The Incredible Sulk

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    Okay so everyone wants to be an old school pirate right? Sadly we can't just go around killing each other, and raping women......legally.

    BUT if we combine Pirates....with modern day paintball it could be done. The sword to sword combat could be tough to figure out.

    But make a couple braces of old school flintlock replicas made for paintball. Got a couple of ships? Make targets zones on them and jimmy up some kind of paint cannon.....hit all the targets....and shes down. Board the other teams ship and duke it out.

    I will work on the sword problem though.
     
  12. Law

    Law rip ninjacat that zarcon made me

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    We politely ask them if they wish to partake in a sword fight. If they decline we shoot them with our Blunderbusses.
     
  13. laminaatplaat

    laminaatplaat GBAtemp Advanced Fan

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    get a nice boat from www.wally.com the have so realy cool designs!

    [​IMG]

    and get a parrot or a monkey!
     
  14. Westside

    Westside Sogdiana

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    I would suggest purchasing some F-18 Hornets along with some F-35s. This will be our boat.
    [​IMG]
     
  15. laminaatplaat

    laminaatplaat GBAtemp Advanced Fan

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    you can always get the Lego version of that...

    [​IMG]

    If you dont have the money atm or something.
     
  16. Westside

    Westside Sogdiana

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    Well the carrier it self is $4.5 Billion USD for the Nimitz carrier in the pic.

    As for F-18s, they are $35 Million A piece...
     
  17. Moots

    Moots The Incredible Sulk

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    .......That would cost a bit aswell.....lego doesn't come cheap these days.

    Side note, I can't wait for the lego mmo type thingy.
     
  18. WeaponXxX
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    WeaponXxX Too F'in Blonde

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    Thanks to all the serious replies, some good ships shown! Right now I have one thing preoccupying me from a life of piracy but by 2010 who knows where that will lead you know? And sorry Moots but I am looking for real pirates here...you know what they say about rom pirating, its a gateway to ... well ... sea piracy! I mean robbing freighters is a crime and as Captain, well the loot is what strikes my fancy. The murders and rape would be purely optional to the crew. Well the only real problem I see is that as the world is now fully explored and there are planes and helicopters, again once a survivor said "My boat was hijacked from a ship that looked like this" ... well we'd be sitting ducks. So there are two options, the first is what pirates USED to do and that is give them an option to join my crew. They'd be giving the chores of cleaning and cooking and whatever else is needed on the ship (The lowest in the crew ranking). Then if they refuse there is but only one other options...true it is a sad one but pirates are pirates after all. So far so good, looks like CockroachMan will be my first crew member!
     
  19. Mewgia

    Mewgia drifter

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    I'll join!

    I've always wanted to be a pirate, I have the capability to be pretty good physically, my aim's not bad, and I am a musician (since you always need musicians on a ship).

    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  20. Salamantis

    Salamantis GBAtemp Advanced Maniac

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    If you play that pirate song from Lazy Town I WILL BE THERE