Where to begin...
I've been in retail for five, almost six years, this April will mark my sixth year in retail (yay!), and I've got plenty of stories to share.. but I think I'll start out with one of my absolute favorite stories.
Electronics Boutique is such a fun place to work for. Especially when your customers don't know what the hell they're talking about.
Case in point, people who don't know what games are for what system.
Why do I say this?
I walked into my previous place of retail enjoyment in the mall in which it was situated, punched in and had a normal day until she arrived.
Mother of three or four, two of them tagging along with, and completely certian she knew what she was after was the correct item.
What was she after?
A Mario game for the X-Box. Let me say that again. A Mario (as in Super Mario Brothers) game for the X-Box.
I know what your thinking, "Mario games are for Nintendo systems.", well, when I casually explained "Mam, Mario games aren't avalable for the Microsoft X-Box.. I can happily show you where they're at, if you'd like." The lady looked at me as if I'd castrated her favorite animal with a rusty knife.
"What do you mean, they're not avalable for the X-Box?" she asked with a glare that could be mistaken for daggers directly into the heart of the retail associate. At this point I'm thinking "Oh ____. She's dense as ____ and her (more than likely) son has told her that his favorite game has come on the wrong system." I slowly, and carefully explain "Mam, Mario games are a licensed item under the Nintendo brand name, until Nintendo sells the Mario name to Microsoft, the owners of the X-Box, there will never be a Mario game on the X-Box or X-Box 360," at this point she looked at me and told me "You don't know anything about these games, my 11 year old son told me he wanted Super Mario -Whatever- for his XBox 360." I was extremely offended by this, because I've been collecting a gaming magazine since 1989, the first year of their publication, and I pride myself on being a walking encyclopedia of games, knowledge, and trivia about games. However, the wonderful world of retail's unwritten rule states that "you must remain calm at all times when dealing with customers" what it doesn't say is "you must remain calm at all times when dealing with customers, dispite how stupid they may be." Again, I casually remarked "Mam, if you'll follow me to the Nintendo section I will be happy to show you where you can find any Mario game your heart, or your son's heart so desires, maybe you'll even recognise the one he's after by the name. I can't promise you anything though," emphasis on the Nintendo portion. At this point the lady started bubbling up and looked the color of freshly billowing lava.
"Look you stupid ___ing retail peon, I don't need you to show me the ____ing Nintendo section, I need to know where the ____ I can find the God ____ Mario XBox 360." I said "Alright mam, I'll show you where you can find all of the Xbox 360 games, and if you locate it, I'll ring you up and you can be on your way." the lady stared at me like she was looking at an on-coming train. and said "About ____ing time." I slowly guided her to the X-Box 360 section and let her go about her means in her persuit of the elusive Mario 360 game.
Ten to thirty minutes later, she came up to me, and proceeded to tell me that she couldn't find it. I wonder why...
At this point I loaded up the search engine for our stock, and pulled her around when I searched for "Mario", and searched in the X-Box and X-Box 360 sections, knowing that I'd find nothing. A few seconds passed and nothing turned up. Again, I wasn't suprised. I turned to her, and I admit, probably said the wrong thing, but I said "Mam, I told you, there are no games for the X-Box systems, however if we look under all known Nintendo related systems, you can see that there are plenty to choose from, if you would like to pick from those I'm sure you could find the one you're looking for." She turned to me and screamed, about then, the manager got back from lunch and asked me what was going on, and I carefully, and quickly explained the situation. At this point, the manager carefully explained to her (again) that Mario was not avalable for the X-Box systems. She got extremely angry at this point, and asked for our district number, of course, being the associate who'd taken (so far) two hours with her, I happily complied and gave it to her.
She pulled out her cell (why didn't she pull it out in the first place and ask her son what system the game is for is beyond me.. and unfortunately for me I couldn't ask her to do that), and called district. District, for the third time, told her that she was SOL when trying to find a Mario X-Box game. She got so angry she threw her Motorola Razr on the ground and stormed out of the store. I quickly gathered the parts and put it behind the counter, and ten minutes later she came back for it, and screamed at both myself, and the manager that she was going to go to another store in search of the game.
I bid her a wonderful day, and wished her luck in her search.
I never saw her again, athough, I will mention she tried going to another EB, which promptly called us to ask if I'd assisted her (because apparently she'd told them she'd had "horrible" service from us), and I acknowledged that I had, the associate on the other side of the phone said "Okay" with a tinge of laughter in their voice.. and hung up. Thirty minutes later they called back, and let me know that she couldn't find it in their store either, which, frankly didn't suprise either of us, but we still get a laugh out of it to this day.
Makes me wonder if she ever found it...
