8 simple rules if you want to date my daughter

Discussion in 'The Edge of the Forum' started by Noctosphere, Oct 8, 2016.

  1. Noctosphere
    OP

    Noctosphere Adoptive father of my kitty named Zelda

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    Back with kitty Zelda forever :D
    1. Use your hands on my daughter and you'll lose them after.
    2. You make her cry, I make you cry.
    3. Safe sex is a myth. Anything you try will be hazardous to your health.
    4. Bring her home late, there's no next date.
    5. If you pull into my driveway and honk, you better be dropping off a package because you're sure not picking anything up.
    6. No complaining while you're waiting for her. If you're bored, change my oil.
    7. If your pants hang off your hips, I'll gladly secure them with my staple gun.
    8. Dates must be in crowded public places. You want romance? Read a book.
     
    hobbledehoy899 likes this.
  2. FAST6191

    FAST6191 Techromancer

    pip Reporter
    19
    Nov 21, 2005
    United Kingdom
    1) I never quite got feet but I suppose I can try.
    2) I am a sensitive man, feel free.
    3) What colour wings is that for my tattoo collection?
    4) That is not very nice. It is not like I have much say in the menstrual cycle.
    5) J-turn it is then.
    6) Why do you think I am highly versed in portable game consoles?
    7) Are they not supposed to hang off my hips? I mean I guess I could go old man style and go for ribs, having them hang around my arse is not easy to walk with.
    8) If only you knew.
     
    gnmmarechal, nxwing and VinsCool like this.
  3. Enigma Hall

    Enigma Hall GBAtemp Advanced Fan

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    Feb 6, 2013
    Brazil
    I have only one rule to say to any boyfriend of my daughter.
    I have a katana, and I know how to use it.
    Followed for a sadic crazy smile face.
     
  4. smileyhead

    smileyhead Press Start whenever!

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    Aug 31, 2015
    Hungary
    Hungary
    9. Whatever you do to her I will do to you.
     
  5. migles

    migles GBAtemp Guru

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    Earth-chan
    1. *uses demn dick on daugher*
    2. *makes her cum so hard, she cries* yeah, i am waiting for you now to make me cum so hard to make me cry
    3. yolo! *subscribes to a premium insurace, *get loads of money, dies very rich and very happy*
    4. we are not even going out of the room!
    5. of course i am delivering her my package!
    6. can i change your daugher's oil instead? if answer is no, ok sure ,let me go into the store to get the other olive oil brand
    7. I like shorts! They're comfy and easy to wear!
    8. romance? pff that's bullshit for pussies, i just wanna use your daughter

    — Posts automatically merged - Please don't double post! —

    in brasil?
    *pays 50 bucks to kill you*
    or
    *get's an uzi from favela*
    a katana there is wortheless
     
  6. Engert

    Engert I love me

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    Jan 21, 2012
    United States
    Taxachusetts
    What is the purpose of this topic?
     
  7. Noctosphere
    OP

    Noctosphere Adoptive father of my kitty named Zelda

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    7
    GBAtemp Patron
    Noctosphere is a Patron of GBAtemp and is helping us stay independent!

    Our Patreon
    Dec 30, 2013
    Canada
    Back with kitty Zelda forever :D
    none of you get it, type 8 simple rules on google, and youll see what i meant :)
    I though someone would get it before :)
     
  8. Flame

    Flame Me > You

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    rules from a shit tv show?

    you should man the fuck up, and join a fight club.

    1st rule of fight club.....
     
  9. Noctosphere
    OP

    Noctosphere Adoptive father of my kitty named Zelda

    Member
    7
    GBAtemp Patron
    Noctosphere is a Patron of GBAtemp and is helping us stay independent!

    Our Patreon
    Dec 30, 2013
    Canada
    Back with kitty Zelda forever :D
    i simply remembered i watched this when i was young
     
  10. migles

    migles GBAtemp Guru

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    Earth-chan
    rule 34

    — Posts automatically merged - Please don't double post! —

    never heard of it before, never aired here...
    from the 2000s the only sitcom i trully enjoyed was malcom in the middle
    no shit laugh tracks!

    ho wait, i also liked HYMYM
     
  11. Enigma Hall

    Enigma Hall GBAtemp Advanced Fan

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    Feb 6, 2013
    Brazil
    Well. She know enogh to stay away of this kind of boyfriend. Then I'm fine.
     
  12. gnmmarechal

    gnmmarechal GBAtemp Guru

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    hum..... That can have some... serious implications.
     
    hobbledehoy899 likes this.
  13. Noctosphere
    OP

    Noctosphere Adoptive father of my kitty named Zelda

    Member
    7
    GBAtemp Patron
    Noctosphere is a Patron of GBAtemp and is helping us stay independent!

    Our Patreon
    Dec 30, 2013
    Canada
    Back with kitty Zelda forever :D
    i think that was the goal :)
     
  14. smileyhead

    smileyhead Press Start whenever!

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    Aug 31, 2015
    Hungary
    Hungary
    This applies to sex and beating as well.
    ...mostly beating, but...
     
    gnmmarechal likes this.
  15. mashers

    mashers Stubborn ape

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    Jun 10, 2015
    Kongo Jungle
    8 simple rules if you want to walk my dog.
    1. Use your hands on my dog and you'll lose them after during.
    2. You make him bark, I make you bark.
    3. Safe dog farts are a myth. Anything you smell will be hazardous to your health.
    4. Bring him home late, there's no next walk.
    5. If you pull into my driveway and honk, you better be dropping off a package because you're sure not picking up any dog shit.
    6. No complaining while you're waiting for him to stop chasing his tail. If you're bored, write my dissertation.
    7. If your pants hang off your hips, it will only make it easier for him to try to eat them.
    8. Walks must be in crowded public places. You want bestiality? Read a book.
     
    xtheman, Noctosphere and gnmmarechal like this.
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