What is your favorite anti-piracy message?

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For as long as video games have existed, so too have pirates. No matter the personal reasoning behind their choices, there's always gamers out there eagerly waiting for the second a game launches, not to buy it, but rather so that the scene teams can get their hands on it and undo the DRM protecting the game's files, or so that it can be played on an emulator.

Sometimes, these quick DRM-removal uploads miss something, and the game KNOWS that you're playing an illegal copy. Depending on what tricks the developers left in the game, it could mean a secret hidden message that calls you out on your actions, or it's a simple way of messing with the player. One of the most notable "anti-piracy" messages comes from Pokemon Fire Red and Leaf Green, which famously has a message that triggers when playing a copy on an early version of a GBA emulator, or so the story goes. While talking to the ferryman who checks your ticket to board the S.S. Anne, he'll let you through, but not before giving you a passing message of, "By the way: if you like this game, buy it or die".

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The legitimacy of the text has been debated for years, and interested dataminers have tried their best to find this mysterious message in the ROM's files. Present in only a single incredibly early ROM dump and nowhere else, the most sensible explanation is that the original hacker who backed up their game left the text in a place where it wouldn't immediately be found, but would be seen by just enough people to make waves across the internet.

And it did, for years. Both startling and funny, the message's legendary status likely inspired developers to include such references in their data. A legitimate occurrence of a game's developers having their last laugh at pirates can be found in Game Dev Tycoon, a game about making games. As you build upon your career as a video game maker, your company will grow and prosper...at least until you're given a report within the first hour of the game. If you're playing a "cracked" copy--which was uploaded specifically by creators themselves, they left a sneaky surprise. Your studio has tons of fans, and your games are well-liked, but it seems that...gamers keep pirating your games! Game Dev Tycoon goes meta, claiming that if the players don't support the official release and rely on piracy, then the company you've spent a while managing will go bankrupt! Well played.

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Recently, fake anti-piracy messages have been flooding YouTube, attempting to make realistic-looking or creepy-pasta level AP text, proving that players are still amused by hidden messages from developers still to this day. Whether it's Pokemon Black and White trolling the player by not giving you any EXP at all, Earthbound upping the encounter rate to an unbearable degree to punish you, or Mirror's Edge taking away the ability to run, what's your favorite anti-piracy message or effect?
 
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I want to remind all that, if Earthbound's anti-piracy measures are so unique, its thanks to Iwata. He re-made the code from scratch. He surely didn't fucked up with piracy
 
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I myself don't think I ever stumbled into an anti-piracy measure or what, as far as I remember, but I've read on tvtropes about some amusing one, one of them being the game pratically imploding in Red Alert 2

at 4:44
 
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Zurdonx

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Man, I remember that I couldn't play Crash Bash on my modded PSone, despite the disc being legit. Every time I tried to play it the game showed a screen saying SOFTWARE TERMINATED. CONSOLE MAY HAVE BEEN MODIFIED.
 
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For me it's always been the Arcade Machine warnings that I get before playing them on MAME.

Something about seeing that they're only meant to be played in Japan, their year and a sense of accomplishment from making sure I have a copy long after most of the machines are kaput.
 

raxadian

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Spyro on PS1 is definitely memorable and makes the game not only impossible to 100% complete but even to finish the game.
 

Kwyjor

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Eh, it's a topic that's been done to death, I'm afraid. Came here to mention Zak McKraken and Full Extent of the Jam, and they're already here.

Probably the just shapes and beats piracy screen(does this count as anti piracy?)
That's a new one, though. Just Shapes and Beats is a darn nifty game; it's a pity it's still so expensive.
 
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Hells Malice

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Game Dev Tycoon wins hands down just because it is hilariously meta.

I prefer the ones that do crazy crap though, like Serious Sam 3

Skullgirls has a pretty hilarious message though. It'd ask what the square root of a fish is, and it made a bunch of idiots out themselves as pirates when they'd ask what it meant. Quality stuff that is.
 

DS1

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Many space games will have some kind of play on space piracy vs software piracy (first saw one with one of the later entries in the Elite series).

They usually amuse me.
Can't find the elite one right now but
https://tcrf.net/Star_Trek:_The_Kobayashi_Alternative

My favorite was Escape Velocity, where an NPC would periodically remind you to buy the full version during the trial period. Once the trial was up, he would just do a strafing run on your ship which was almost impossible to escape from.
 
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raxadian

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I had more anti.piracy problems with legit games that I ever had with pirates due to stupid copy protection needing stuff like having the CD on even if you fully installed the game, asking you to solve a puzzle every time you started the game and so on.
 
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DJPlace

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that mario party DS anit-piracy shit on youtube is scary has hell it's like a mix between five night's at freddy's and sonic.exe
 

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I was immediately thinking of game dev tycoon and that serious Sam 3 situation. But in terms of schadenfreude, nothing beats this one:

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For those unfamiliar : the wii homebrew channel has this kind of protection, iirc if you start messing around with the actual IOS'es (that the wii uses, and I think the hbc as well) instead of 'safely' using cIOS'es in empty places on the thing. Basically : if you modded it wrong.
I was fairly new to gbatemp, but 'sort of knew' how having a wii worked. Yet pretty soon I was one of the 'experts', simply because many were way more clueless of the process and what it does.
There was a time where every other week someone popped in with a message like this. And then things went short if like this :
Noob: halp! My homebrew channel is upside down!
Us: okay... You need to obtain fresh IOS'es from nusd and use a wad installer to re-install <a bunch of IOS'es> to fix this.
Noob: huh? IOS? Wads? I just wanna play games!
Someone : what guide did you follow to hack your wii?
(on hindsight, I suspect at least some just asked this out of schadenfreude as well)
Noob: some obscure YouTube channel that hasn't been edited in years, with files from some site.
Us : yeah... That's your problem. :tpi:


(note : I've got to admit I've ran into this myself when first messing with Sneek. But this was more a hobby project than anything else so it was somehow both frustrating and hilarious at the same time :P)
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Bladexdsl

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I think I had that game legit (with that, I mean my older brother did) but didn't have the manual / code book... or at least I didn't know there was one
did you have the CD version or was it part of a game pack with other games? the codebook and manual would have been on the CD. when i first played it i got it as part of a pack of other games in a long sleeve of plastic cd covers there wasn't any manual for any of the games. so when i encountered so called puzzle i thought the game was broken and took it back to the shops. they than explained to me that there is a codebook on the cd you must use. and i was like: :wtf:
 
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