Need help with things.

[Pacheko17]

Guys, I need your help... Somehow.
I've been liking a girl for some time now, but the problem is, I'm very very shy, and she is also very shy. The biggest conversation we had was 2 minutes long. She doesn't have any friends and is bullied all the time, so I really want to befriend her not only to learn more about her but just to make her happy because I hate seeing people in a situation worse than mine, but I just can't. My friend said she would help me out, but she isn't really helping much, so that's why I figured asking help for random strangers on a video-game forum would be a nice idea.

I'm so desperate in fact, that even Shia LaBeouf's motivational speech is helping me.

;-;

 

[FAST6191]

So you are 21 if your profile is accurate. To that end no need for high school nonsense any more and just ask her out if that is what you reckon you want to do. If she says no you have lost precisely nothing. Befriending someone with the motive of ultimately asking them out is a valid way but not an especially good method.

That said "so I really want to befriend her not only to learn more about her but just to make her happy because I hate seeing people in a situation worse than mine". That is heading into savior/white knight complex territory. Don't be that guy.

 

[Pacheko17]

So you are 21 if your profile is accurate. To that end no need for high school nonsense any more and just ask her out if that is what you reckon you want to do. If she says no you have lost precisely nothing. Befriending someone with the motive of ultimately asking them out is a valid way but not an especially good method.

That said "so I really want to befriend her not only to learn more about her but just to make her happy because I hate seeing people in a situation worse than mine". That is heading into savior/white knight complex territory. Don't be that guy.

Well, thanks. But I'm not on school... It's like, after school. I don't have very good english so I forgot the name... University I think. But yeah... Thanks either way

 

[TotalInsanity4]

Well, thanks. But I'm not on school... It's like, after school. I don't have very good english so I forgot the name... University I think. But yeah... Thanks either way

College or University, yes. I agree with @FAST6191, just buck up and do it. From what it sounds like asking her out for dinner someplace would be good for the both of you

Google Translate translation (I'm so sorry if this gets horribly f*cked)
カレッジや大学、はい。私は FAST6191 に同意、ちょうど急ぐし、それを行います。夕食に彼女を求めてみたいからどこかは両方のあなたのために良いだろう

 

[Pacheko17]

College or University, yes. I agree with @FAST6191, just buck up and do it. From what it sounds like asking her out for dinner someplace would be good for the both of you

Google Translate translation (I'm so sorry if this gets horribly f*cked)
カレッジや大学、はい。私は FAST6191 に同意、ちょうど急ぐし、それを行います。夕食に彼女を求めてみたいからどこかは両方のあなたのために良いだろう

Haha xD No need for translation, I can understand english perfectly, I just don't have a big vocabulary. And I'm impressed with Google on this one, it actually turned out great. Well, first I need to create courage to talk to her because I'm just not used to talking with other people, that's why I'm shy. My friends all are helping me alot, giving me motivation to keep trying ( One of them even gave me Skyrim ), but I wish they did more than that... I don't know what but still, one of them is trying to befriend her so it gets easier for me to ask her out and talk to her... But anyways, I still have to create courage.

And thanks for trying out the translation, that's very sweet of you xD ありがとう

 

[Cyan]

I can't help (as I'm probably as shy as you, if not more).
just want to wish you good luck. If it works for you, at least one of us could did it !

edit:
Do it while you can...
don't wait.

 

[Pacheko17]

I can't help (as I'm probably as shy as you, if not more).
just want to wish you good luck. If it works for you, at least one of us could did it !

edit:
Do it while you can...
don't wait.

Thank you, shy brother :v
I'm pretty sure you can do it too.

 

[Cyan]

I can't anymore.

I'm just too stupid and never act.
it's always too late and full of regrets.

 

[Pacheko17]

I can't anymore.

I'm just too stupid and never act.
it's always too late and full of regrets.

Nunununono.
If I do it, then you will be able to do it too. I am literally in the bottom of a hole, I have everything wrong in my life, I filled my mind with lies and chuunibyou ( Google it ). I promise not to give up if you don't give up too.

 

[Prans]

My friends all are helping me alot, giving me motivation to keep trying ( One of them even gave me Skyrim ), but I wish they did more than that...

Tell them to give you your favorite console and supply you games forever!

Just joking!

But really though, the answer is confidence, trust yourself and ask her out. I know it's horribly hard and seemingly impossible for shy people, but that's how you start off. If she turns you down, then you got nothing to lose but gained more confidence in yourself!

 

[Cyan]

then you got nothing to lose but gained more confidence in yourself!

I think that's the contrary.
Everytime, it only makes you feel inferior a little more.

 

[Prans]

I think that's the contrary.
Everytime, it only makes you feel inferior a little more.

But if he doesn't make a move now, when will he? And what if someone asks her out before he does? At least he could say he tried.

 

[Cyan]

yes, he should try.
Like I told him on my first reply here, "do it while you can, DON'T WAIT".

He will not get better or stronger if she says no, but he won't have regrets for not acting. (maybe regrets for acting, but, hey, it's a choice you have to take)

 

[Issac]

I know tha Cyan is a really shy guy, even more shy than I ever was (and I thought I was the shyest guy in the world). Now we're three shy guys!


Just like Shia say: "Just do it!"

Don't wait, and don't let the shyness win. Talk to her, let her be shy. If she doesn't talk, don't push her, but don't walk away. Be there, be quiet together.

 

[VinsCool]

I know that feel :/ Been there, done that.

The only advice I have for you: Take a big inspiration, and do it!

That worked for me, it should for you

 

[Pacheko17]

I know tha Cyan is a really shy guy, even more shy than I ever was (and I thought I was the shyest guy in the world). Now we're three shy guys!


Just like Shia say: "Just do it!"

Don't wait, and don't let the shyness win. Talk to her, let her be shy. If she doesn't talk, don't push her, but don't walk away. Be there, be quiet together.

That's some very nice advice, thank you ^^. I'll eat with her on the lunch time recess, it's like, an hour long, they let us go outside of the school to eat anywhere we want, and me and her always go to the same place, and since she's always alone, it will be easier.

Edit: Meant to say university xD

 

[Cyan]

I know tha Cyan is a really shy guy, even more shy than I ever was (and I thought I was the shyest guy in the world). Now we're three shy guys!
Just like Shia say: "Just do it!"
Don't wait, and don't let the shyness win. Talk to her, let her be shy. If she doesn't talk, don't push her, but don't walk away. Be there, be quiet together.

because we can't like X2, I'll quote it
1. Thanks for remembering me and our talks.
2. I would recommend the same thing, if she's shy too, don't go away. unless she told you to.
If she's fine with you around her, stay with her, don't try too hard or you might bother her.

Also, are you really from tokyo? that would be like +8h from me, you didn't sleep?
you're probably more like -7H from me

 

[T-hug]

Just talk to her! Don't ask her out right away but talk. Ask her about herself and what she likes and the rest will come naturally if it's meant to be.

 

[Pacheko17]

because we can't like X2, I'll quote it
1. Thanks for remembering me and our talks.
2. I would recommend the same thing, if she's shy too, don't go away. unless she told you to.
If she's fine with you around her, stay with her, don't try too hard or you might bother her.

Also, are you really from tokyo? that would be like +8h from me, you didn't sleep?
you're probably more like -7H from me

I don't sleep on most weekends, and I have college at night, so I just always end up sleeping on the afternoon. It's 7:41AM right now, I slept just 2 hours this night, but I'm fine

 

[Issac]

Oh yeah, like T-hug say: "Don't ask her out right away".

Take THAT part slowly, but hurry up and interact with her.
You can't make her stop being shy, but you can hide your own shyness. Be brave!

That's one thing I've noticed actually: that pretending to not be shy (even though it freaks you out internally) is really effective and makes it easier each time you do that.

because we can't like X2, I'll quote it
1. Thanks for remembering me and our talks.

Bien sûr I don't forget my friends!