I am currently enrolled in a Chinese language course at my University where I am a Ph.D. student in the field of Computer Engineering. As I have never studied Chinese language before, it just so happens that it is the first-year first-semester level course.
The class was recently assigned a group project to author and present a discussion in Chinese. As it so happened, one of the more attractive female students in the course expressed the desire to partner with me, which was kind of cool. We decided to meet together yesterday evening to practice the dialog before presenting it in class tomorrow.
As you can probably guess from my major and current academic standing, I don't actually get out much, and am perpetually "married to my work." Because of this, I was genuinely excited simply to be getting out of the house to hang out with a pretty young girl.
Before you assume this is one of those "she broke my heart" whiny threads, it is not - she is a freshman student and I have absolutely no romantic interest in her. The source of my excitement was purely due to the rarity of the event in question, and my hope that getting some face time with the opposite sex would be therapeutic in some way. (For the uninitiated, the male-to-female ratio in Computer Engineering is approximately 10:1, so it had actually been a number of years since I had been in a social situation involving females.)
In any event, I actually left our discussion practice that evening more insulted and angry than I have felt in many years.
To begin, she never really did the work she said that she would do. She was also on her phone the whole time not just texting her friends, but sending them pictures of herself ("Snapchatting"?). She also spent the majority of the time talking shit on other people in the class, and told me at one point that "You're going to fuck up. I have no faith in you" (in regards to memorizing and repeating the dialogue). Finally, after all of that, she had the nerve to ask me for a ride to her dorm so that she didn't have to walk there.
Now, again, I don’t get out very often, so I’m not really sure what to contribute to this girl acting like this. I have considered three theories:
1) She is just an absolute fucking idiot.
This is the easiest thing to blame for her acting this way. She was intentionally being rude and doing this stupid shit to somehow demonstrate I was unimportant to her or just because she generally didn’t give a shit.
2) She is immature and didn’t realize she was being rude.
I’m guessing this is the most probable situation. To me, as a 22-year-old, messaging other people on your phone while you are meeting with someone else is extremely rude. But do younger kids think this is okay? Same with regards to the gossiping and telling me (you know, the Ph.D. student) that I was going to fuck up.
I dated a girl who was three years younger than me when I was in high school (holy shit, would not do again), and my most vivid memories from that time involve me not being able to get mad at her about some of the things that she did or said because she genuinely did not understand the repercussions of her actions due to the fact that she simply didn’t have the real-world maturity to know any better. This situation may be similar.
3) I am out of touch with the rest of society and the things she was doing and saying are considered okay now.
As I said, I seriously don’t get out very often. At my current rate (has been so for the past 2 or 3 years), I attend a social event once every 4 months or so. With technology and society advancing at such a rapid pace now, maybe it’s considered normal to do some of that stuff now and I just don’t know.
Can any of the more outgoing members of the Temp fill me in on what they believe the issue is here so that I can justify my anger if it is indeed well-founded or, if needed, adjust my world-view so that future social encounters don’t end with me being super fucking pissed.
The class was recently assigned a group project to author and present a discussion in Chinese. As it so happened, one of the more attractive female students in the course expressed the desire to partner with me, which was kind of cool. We decided to meet together yesterday evening to practice the dialog before presenting it in class tomorrow.
As you can probably guess from my major and current academic standing, I don't actually get out much, and am perpetually "married to my work." Because of this, I was genuinely excited simply to be getting out of the house to hang out with a pretty young girl.
Before you assume this is one of those "she broke my heart" whiny threads, it is not - she is a freshman student and I have absolutely no romantic interest in her. The source of my excitement was purely due to the rarity of the event in question, and my hope that getting some face time with the opposite sex would be therapeutic in some way. (For the uninitiated, the male-to-female ratio in Computer Engineering is approximately 10:1, so it had actually been a number of years since I had been in a social situation involving females.)
In any event, I actually left our discussion practice that evening more insulted and angry than I have felt in many years.
To begin, she never really did the work she said that she would do. She was also on her phone the whole time not just texting her friends, but sending them pictures of herself ("Snapchatting"?). She also spent the majority of the time talking shit on other people in the class, and told me at one point that "You're going to fuck up. I have no faith in you" (in regards to memorizing and repeating the dialogue). Finally, after all of that, she had the nerve to ask me for a ride to her dorm so that she didn't have to walk there.
Now, again, I don’t get out very often, so I’m not really sure what to contribute to this girl acting like this. I have considered three theories:
1) She is just an absolute fucking idiot.
This is the easiest thing to blame for her acting this way. She was intentionally being rude and doing this stupid shit to somehow demonstrate I was unimportant to her or just because she generally didn’t give a shit.
2) She is immature and didn’t realize she was being rude.
I’m guessing this is the most probable situation. To me, as a 22-year-old, messaging other people on your phone while you are meeting with someone else is extremely rude. But do younger kids think this is okay? Same with regards to the gossiping and telling me (you know, the Ph.D. student) that I was going to fuck up.
I dated a girl who was three years younger than me when I was in high school (holy shit, would not do again), and my most vivid memories from that time involve me not being able to get mad at her about some of the things that she did or said because she genuinely did not understand the repercussions of her actions due to the fact that she simply didn’t have the real-world maturity to know any better. This situation may be similar.
3) I am out of touch with the rest of society and the things she was doing and saying are considered okay now.
As I said, I seriously don’t get out very often. At my current rate (has been so for the past 2 or 3 years), I attend a social event once every 4 months or so. With technology and society advancing at such a rapid pace now, maybe it’s considered normal to do some of that stuff now and I just don’t know.
Can any of the more outgoing members of the Temp fill me in on what they believe the issue is here so that I can justify my anger if it is indeed well-founded or, if needed, adjust my world-view so that future social encounters don’t end with me being super fucking pissed.