since i mostly stays at home and rarely goes out.I think I'm on the verge of going crazy. I don't have any friends so i can't find any motivation to go outside. I don't have a bike/car so i have to walk even if i want to go out. Never had a girlfriends or any SO since i was birth and i think this won't change for the rest of my life.
days i hated the most are those festival days/holiday. why? because when i opened my social media i saw all those happy people hangout with their friends and having fun while i just stays at home and being envious of them. i fell like no one likes me, and I can't do anything about it.
i just don't know what to do anymore. sometimes i ask myself where have i done wrong? why do i become like this? what is the point of me living if nothing will ever change and it just keep happening again and again?
playing video games is just something i lied to myself that i am actually having fun. i just stare blankly to the screen and move the character while my mind just keep thinking about those awful things.
sorry but i just wanted to speak out my mind. those past 2 years are really agonizing.
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