This has been bugging me for a while. You have heard the stories of kids who persistently act out yet their parents pretend not to notice or just don't care. I wonder if the kids act out because their parents treat them just the same no matter if the kids have done things they actually realize to be "good" or "bad" - and so have come to the conclusion that their parents don't give a flying fuck if they are good or bad, and are desperately trying to find a limit to their parent's indifference.
That who new age whatever parenting theory is shit. Sure it may be possible to raise a child without punishing them significantly, but you still need to teach your children the basics of understanding right and wrong - the kids won't pick it up on their own if they do not understand what to look for, sort of like trying to copy a painting despite being color blind
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