Wow, what a first-world problem.
I have to stay up for the next 24hrs caring for a critical condition cat, and I have had ALL the caffeine. I'm antsy about having to put a needle in the little kitten in an hour. Rather than be productive about writing, I felt like typing words into the abyss of this blog post. It'll probably be all over the place but yknow, that's what a blog is for. Probably.
I love writing gaming news--covering the industry is genuinely fun, and it's a "job" that I enjoy for certain. But sometimes, while I'm writing, I think to myself, "WOW! That is a game I want to play but probably won't for the next few years. Cool!" I've had my eye on a handful of really fun games that have come out within the past year, and I keep seeing them either in press releases or emails and for a brief moment I think, one day I'll get around to it. And then I never do. For every game I want to play, there are 50 other things I want to write about or discuss instead. Or maybe I just want to sit in my chair and stare at a wall for what turns into 3 hours doing absolutely nothing worthwhile. Oops.
I love gaming, but I spend more time writing about them or casually discussing games rather than playing them. It's weird. I tried playing BioShock the other day, and about 15 minutes into it I got distracted and instead went to watch an analytical video about Just Cause. I enjoyed listening to the game's mechanics than I ever did actually playing Just Cause. I never got back around to playing Bioshock.
I spent two hours hunting down games for my Switch, tricking it out with downloads of every cool game I've ever wanted to try. And then I proceeded to play none of those cool games. I can't motivate myself to even pick up the Switch unless it's to sate that weird productivity bug of wanting my Switch to HAVE everything cool "in case", rather than to actually make use of it. If not for reviewing Mario 3D World and promising to a friend to play with them, I don't think I would have even gotten around to playing it yet. Yikes.
Then there's the friendly recommendations. Not just of games, but of all media. "Hey Chary watch this show", "omg Chary this manga", "You have GOT to try this game!". I appreciate and love talking to friends about these things, but I hardly get around to actually reading/watching/playing any of it. I always feel bad, and then in my mind, it almost becomes a chore rather than a fun activity. There's even a bit of guilt when I end up doing something else. Do they get annoyed because I secretly binged an anime no one told me to watch rather than listen to their recommendation? It's not because I didn't want to, it's just because my brain craved stupid mindless derpage. I don't want to not be recommended things though. Is my brain making more out of this than I realistically ever should? Yes.
Is any of this coherent? Probably not. There's just so many things I WANT to experience, and since we're all locked down at home, media is the easiest thing to experience. It's all pretty meaningless in the grand scheme of life, but I still want to understand references, enjoy content, and be able to discuss things with friends.
I just wanted to type words. Words that were meaningless and without obligation or following any sort of thought process.
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