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da_head By da_head, Sep 26, 2008 14 0

  • *sigh*. well this is my first time writing a blog...here goes lol.

    yeah so i just started university this year. good chance to meet ALOT of new ppl (compared to the scope of high school), so i decided to make the best of it. met this girl, started hanging out with her. i luckily had 4 classes with her per week, and we coincidentally took the same bus home. we started eatin lunch together regularly, and hanging out alot. things were going very smoothly, and we were very comfortable around each other. one day, she was showing me pictures of her trip to bejing for the olympics. while looking thru the pics, i couldn't help but notice this same guy was in a few of em. curious, i asked her who he was. she casually mentions its her bf who's in china. i was completely shocked and dumbfounded. i didn't no wat to do/say, but i attempted to maintain my composure, and stay "cool". she, not noticing, continues showing me pictures for a few more minutes.

    then i did sumthing incredibly stupid. i confessed to her. yes i know she JUST told me she had a bf, and i've only known her for wat...3 weeks now? y did i do it? to get something of my chest? to purposely make things awkward? iunno...well she was a bit shocked, looked me in the eye and said "i'm sry" in a quiet voice. an awkward silenced followed. she then stated that even though we knew each other for a very short time, she feels very close to me, and doesn't want to lose me bcuz she needs me and my support. course this makes sense, being first year uni, and the difficulty of it, so iuno if that meant much. i had just asked her early to dinner/movies, which she agreed to. but i didn't no wat to make of wat she said. i was tired of being "just friends". i've had enough close friends as it is. tru u can never have enough friends but GOD forbid i experience something a little more...

    but yeah, i know it probably would have better to either: confessed later so there's a greater chance she mite accept, or not say anything at all to spare our friendship. though i just HAD to get it off my chest. can anyone relate?

    anywayz, of course its not her fault, she wasn't leading me on or anything. i blame myself. i blame myself for falling in this situation, and hurting myself, and our friendship. now i'm not posting here for advice, but just wanted to get it off my chest. i truly appreciate u taking the time to read this. i guess i'll go suck it up, and attempt to mend whatever awkwardness that might have ensued from this...

    peace out

    P.S. if u have sum good feedback AND spam, i wouldn't mind xD. i could use a laugh rite now...

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