Tremble before my might, puny Tempers!

So, first off, let me just say... No, I am not posting this blog post because I'm in the midst of my "Can't watch HP7 part 2 depression"-itis. Just so we're all clear on that. Now, without further ado...

I, Shinigami357, have just mastered one of humanity's greatest, century-long secrets. One that only masters can ever claim to learn in one try. In other words...

I have mastered how to crack an egg open. One-handed. Without getting the shell pieces all over the place.

B-)

Yes, yes, I know what you are all thinking. I AM a boss... :mthr:

That will be all for this blog post, thank you.

Comments

[quote name='salamai' post='3773222' date='Jul 14 2011, 05:52 AM']Make a video. I cannot even do with two hands.[/quote]
This.
 
I have BEEN able to do this since I was 10.

Congrats, you have joined the secret order. Make sure to send us an email to get your benefits but DO NOT tell anybody the password!


PS: Password should be inside the first egg you cracked properly. Hope you didn't throw it out. :ninja:
 
Um, pick the egg up with one hand, whack it against something, done?

Or are you actually cracking the egg without anything but your hand?
 
G
No, Evo.lve, it's the technique of cracking it then using your fingers to open the shell, let the egg slide out without the cracked shell getting everywhere, I can do it.
 
[quote name='1234turtles' post='3773235' date='Jul 13 2011, 09:02 PM']i can do it with no hands[/quote]


You know we are talking about cracking eggs, right?
 
[quote name='salamai' post='3773249' date='Jul 14 2011, 12:14 AM'][quote name='1234turtles' post='3773235' date='Jul 13 2011, 09:02 PM']i can do it with no hands[/quote]


You know we are talking about cracking eggs, right?
[/quote]
I can "crack" eggs without using my hands too. All I need is my penis. :creep:
 
[quote name='machomuu' post='3773274' date='Jul 14 2011, 12:30 PM']Egg
Death by Crack

Is that what you wrote?[/quote]



:ph34r:
 
[quote name='TDWP FTW' post='3773268' date='Jul 13 2011, 09:28 PM'][quote name='salamai' post='3773249' date='Jul 14 2011, 12:14 AM'][quote name='1234turtles' post='3773235' date='Jul 13 2011, 09:02 PM']i can do it with no hands[/quote]


You know we are talking about cracking eggs, right?
[/quote]
I can "crack" eggs without using my hands too. All I need is my penis. :creep:
[/quote]

Cause it matches your number of posts?
 
[quote name='salamai' post='3773222' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:52 AM']Make a video. I cannot even do with two hands.[/quote]


A video you say?

[youtube]SuzSxqd7vdE[/youtube]


EDIT: epic, right?
 
I can do it by just pooping a rainbow over the egg, then a chemical reaction between the magic and the egg shell makes the egg shell transform into sparkle dust and the egg yolk and egg white float to wherever I need them to be.

Took some time to master though.
 
[quote name='Vulpes Abnocto' post='3773885' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:43 AM']Now learn to scramble an egg inside it's own shell.[/quote]
That can only be done with the power of a double rainbow.
 
[quote name='machomuu' post='3773887' date='Jul 14 2011, 05:44 PM'][quote name='Vulpes Abnocto' post='3773885' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:43 AM']Now learn to scramble an egg inside it's own shell.[/quote]
That can only be done with the power of a double rainbow.
[/quote]
I'm not that good ):
 
[quote name='machomuu' post='3773887' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:44 AM'][quote name='Vulpes Abnocto' post='3773885' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:43 AM']Now learn to scramble an egg inside it's own shell.[/quote]
That can only be done with the power of a double rainbow.
[/quote]


Or this
http://www.popeilfamilystore.com/egg.html
 
[quote name='Vulpes Abnocto' post='3773907' date='Jul 14 2011, 05:57 PM'][quote name='machomuu' post='3773887' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:44 AM'][quote name='Vulpes Abnocto' post='3773885' date='Jul 14 2011, 11:43 AM']Now learn to scramble an egg inside it's own shell.[/quote]
That can only be done with the power of a double rainbow.
[/quote]


Or this
http://www.popeilfamilystore.com/egg.html
[/quote]
That can't be morally right.
 
Lol. I finally learned this last term, in university. This is what happens when a bored college student decides that playing with her food is better than nothing.

It's not that hard:
- pick up the egg in one hand
- position half of fingers over one half of egg
- position other half over the other side
- crack the egg gently on a hard surface
- use fingers to pull shell gently apart
 
When you see more than 2 steps to crack an egg open, you know shit's intense.

When I do it I get egg all over my fingers and shell goes inside the bowl. Sometimes i'll use a knife to do it and get it all over my face and shit, it's pretty awful.

To make matters worse, when I cook them they're usually burnt, or still runny. I'm fucking awful at life.
 

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