go to chinese restaurant and learn HOW TO USE CHOPSTICK, then order a noodle soup and eat at old traditional way: MAKE AS LOUD AS YOU CAN! then admire the other clients' reactions.
Speaking of meatballs, what's the deal with meatball sandwich? How can people eat those? It's ROUND. Trying to bite those in a sandwich is a challenge. It's easier to eat a burger stacked with toppings.