The Master of Shitposting's AMAZING BLOG!
Welcome to Titanica (Master of Shitposting)'s blog. Here, I try to make each blog as innovative and hilarious as possible, so don't take anything you see here seriously. If you want my recommendations on what to check out first, I say you should check out my "Ant Lives Matter", "How to Not be a Normie", and "Tempy Tempy Tempy" blogs. Have fun!
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So, I've probably been forgotten about.
Ask me anything, I guess? I mean, I see that other people doing this sort of thing so, uh, yeah. Let's see what happens.
Welcome back to Shitty Album. Today's song will be starring my awesome friend, @Taffy. Before I begin, let me explain a couple things. This probably was my hardest song I've made yet. Even though Taffy is awesome, he doesn't have much to work with to put in a song. He's made one blog (which I really enjoyed, please make more) called Taffy's Ten Cents. I couldn't rely only on that blog for this song (hey that rhymes!), so I had to study Taffiology. I got professionals to help me get all the Taffy references into a song, so there may be some obscure references tuck in this song. The song is based off the Super Mario World Cartoon Theme Song. I chose this for Taffy because his avatar resembles a Yoshi (which originated in Super Mario World) and the song itself isn't too long. Without further ado, let's get the talking to the block on the to- y'know screw it, let's go.
Taffy has a Crayon
Taffy has a Crayon
Taffy has a weird, CRAYON.
Taffy has a weird crayon!
He draws with slick style
Hey, Taffy has a Crayon
He's here to give his thoughts.
Titanica and Vintage
Are waiting for their song!
Taffy and his Ten Cents
Are giving away their thoughts!
Taffy has a Crayon
Taffy has a Crayon
Taffy has a weird, CRAYON
Taffy has his ten cents.
He hates the Super Nags.
In Taffy's Ten Cents
He's discussin' the Hax.
Titanica and Vintage
Are getting pissed off!
Taffy and his Ten Cents
Are disappointed in me for not contributing to the community like I promised in my blog, "Experience opened my Eyes", and instead making dumb parody songs!
Taffy has a Crayon
Taffy has a Crayon
Taffy has a weird, CRAYON
In Taffy's Ten Cents
Things are XTRA STABLE
In Taffy's Ten Cents
It's the pinnacle of SCIENCE!
This blog is a damn joke. This is just to challenge myself to see how many dumb songs I can make about other users. Yes, it's an oddly specific challenge.
P.S I am contributing to the community like I promised. I'm making reviews and soon I'll be creating user news.
P.P.S Shoutouts to Taffy, hope you liked it!
Welcome to the second addition of my Shitty Album. This one was inspired by Eix's terrible blogs. Enjoy!
Eix: Seatbelts everyone!
Titanica: Please let this be a normal blog!
smileyhead: With the Eix?!
Everyone: NO WAY!
Crashing down the shit street, you're dead and feeling bad.
Next thing that you know you're seein
A weeb in serious danger!
Try to cover your eyes
Quitting the Temp
Run away from the scary blogs
OH SHIT THERE IS ANOTHER ONE
On the Scary Eix Bus!
Find a weird spikey stick!
Run away from the Scary Eix Bus!
Sprint away from prom!
On the Scary Eix Bus!
Robots will take over Earth!
Such a bad thing to do!
So get your eyes peeled to the blogs
Come on in and don't be shy.
Just to ruin your whole week
YOU WILL QUESTION ALL OF YOUR LIFE AND SUFFER FROM EXISTENTIAL DREAD!
On the Scary Eix Bus!
Step inside- your brain will die!
Come on- RIDE ON THE SCARY EIX BUS!
This blog is not meant to be taken seriously or to offend anyone. Eix is awesome, so don't think I'm sending hate.
Ok, ok, I promised I wouldn't make another blog. However, I wanted to post this somewhere appropriate and my blog seemed to be the best place. I won't be posting any actually stories, just these sort of parodies.
The following is a parody of the infamous Kirby Right Back At Ya theme song.
Tempy, Tempy, Tempy, that's the name you should know.
Tempy, Tempy, Tempy, he's the star of the site.
He's less than you think, and his eyes are scary!
Tempy, Tempy, Tempy's the one.
He's comin right, at your face.
He's comin right, at your face.
Give it all that you've got, make your very best post
Or else the mod-mod- mods will ban you for sure...
SciresM: How can I help you, troubled Newbie?
Newbie: I NEED A WAY TO HACK MY SWITCH, PRONTO!
SciresM: You fucking cunt, why the hell have you not been reading the updates you piece of shit. These things take time you know, and instead of whining to the entire site about how impatient you are, get a hobby and wait patiently like a normal fucking human being.
Titanica: You better stop posting or else you are banned!
*Epic jazz solo*
*Proceeds to show influential members of the site*
Oooh, Tempy, Tempy, Tempy.
Savin' the site!
Tempy Tempy Tempy,
Don't be fooled by his hair, you will believe your eyes!
Tempy Tempy Tempy's the oooooooonee.
Right at your face.
(This blog is a jo- y'know what, fuck it. No one needs to know it's a joke. You gotta be a dunce if you take this seriously.)
Today was a totally normal day. I was browsing GBAtemp, wondering what news there was in Gaming today, what type of Blog should I made, should I finally get around to play Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door? As I was about to answer my questions, I spot something in the little news area on my portal.
My head turns and spots it. The day my life on GBAtemp would change.
XP Points are here.
I dropped everything. I dropped my mouth, I dropped my mouse, I dropped my Sweaty Icebreakers, I dropped any sort of consideration to play Paper Mario, I dropped my dreams of getting my like count to 200.
It was time for me to be reborn.
I quickly clicked on my profile picture to see my level.
"Oh boy, I bet I could be level 10! Nah, your hopes are too high. Probably 7. Or 5. Yeah, I think it's 5!" I thought to myself. After making pointless blogs and putting my insight on countless articles, I had to be a level 5 or up.
I was feeling so happy and hopeful until the little box popped up and crushed all my hopes. I was a level 2. A. LEVEL. 2.
Everything went silent.
I couldn't believe it. What about my likes? What about my messages? What about my blogs?
This shock quickly disappeared in RAGE. I needed to get myself out of this slum. I can't walk around GBAtemp with a LEVEL 2 stamped right under my 7th Grade Title. I gotta get more XP!
I mashed my mouse so much on the link showing how to gain XP. My heart sank.
Blogs weren't on there.
It felt everything I was doing was crushed. All that time planning on what I should put in my blog wasted.
"No one liked your blogs anyway. People hate you for making them anyway, dude. It's OK." I hear myself saying.
But deep down, I tried to deny that. I told myself that there was someone who read my blogs and got a chuckle out of them. After all, I just wanted people to get a little smile out of my blogs. I want people to look at my avatar and think of me as "the funny guy." I wanted to be liked for once, but it just never seemed to happen.
I scrolled down to look at my comments on my blogs. My eyes were opened. I could see that many despised my blogs. What's the point of making these and telling these supposed "funny" stories when no one think they're funny.
That's when I realized that everything I was doing, was pointless. I wasn't contributing to this site. I wasn't being part of the community by making these damn blogs. I was just upsetting it. My hope of getting people to like me turned against me.
No wonder I get so much hate.
My heart shattered, I clicked the blog icon and decided to create one last entry. If people don't like me, that's fine. But I don't want to make anyone unhappy in this amazing community.
I am laying down my crappy blogs to try to contribute to this community. I will try creating reviews to help people learn more about games they're interested in. I will double check anything I post to make sure it does not offend anyone. I don't want to be a lowly level 2 making blogs nobody likes. I want to be a Temper.
(This first paragraph really is just an update. If you don't care, skip to the second for the actual blog).
I haven't made a blog in a while, and I'm sure you're all desperate (probably not) for another one of my humorous (or offensive) stories. Well, I've been running out of ideas. I'd hate to be forced to stop writing blogs but my brain isn't doing a great job of growing some good ideas. So I'm deciding to try and play it safe and easy for a while. After the controversy on the "Gamers" of today, I'm not really sure what to do. Many loved the blog and it's my most liked blog I've ever written, but many also hated it with a burning passion. Although I was happy to see many enjoyed reading it and understanding my troubles, I felt horrible reading all the comments telling how I am a terrible person. So I don't really want to bare seeing those comments and I don't want to make anyone mad. So like I said, my blogs are going to be toned down to small rants or stories that aren't to offensive or strange. With that out of the way, enjoy!
So I was playing Splatoon 2 a couple days ago. I decided to play some Turf War when I was teamed up with someone. I don't really want to name him because I don't want people to go out searching for him. Anyway, I was splatting foes and covering the ground with ink when suddenly I spotted an opponent running up to me with a clash blaster. I began to retreat, but one of my teammates saved me by splatting him with a roller. He booya'd me and I booya'd back. He saved me! Later, he was cornered and an opponent holding a Carbon Roller was about to finish him off. I saved him with my splattershot to pay him back. Soon, we were sticking together and booyaing each other. After the match, I decided to friend him because he seemed like a friendly person. He accepted, and I created a private match. He then joinned.
"Titanica, what the fuck is going on?" I hear you screaming at your monitor. "I was promised a rant by the Entry title and instead I am getting a rip off of your 'Fallen Inkling' blog! You're going on a damn downward spiral and all your blogs are now clickbait for likes, you piece of shit."
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Watch your language! Anyway, you interrupted me right when I was getting to the rant I promised. Also, this blog really isn't a rip off of the Fallen Inkling blog because I added a ton of dramatic effect to it and exaggerated it a lot.
Anyway, the rant. So I wanted to ask this guy if he had Discord or Steam or Skype. Unfortunately, the Switch does not have a chat room feature unless you count the voice chat (which I don't think anyone uses or likes). I wanted to really talk to him though. So I came up with an idea. I changed my username a ton of times. First I changed it to, "Hey, do you." Then I changed it to "Have Discord." Then "Or steam?" Then "Or Skype?"
I could tell he had no idea what was going on until he finally realized it and changed his name to "I have." Then he changed it to "Discord."
We eventually changed our names to our Discord tags. I don't really need to continue because this shows how annoying Nintendo can be. I absolutely love Nintendo but I hate how inconvenient they can be. Why can't they include a chatroom in the Switch? Why does there have to be friend codes? Can't Nintendo get a hint from the other companies and try doing what they do? I love Nintendo for their innovation, but this isn't acceptable. I shouldn't have to change my username over and over just to send a message. I really wish they could do this. They are on a roll with their games, but is it too much to ask for something simple like a chatroom? Or why can't we just search up usernames to friend each other rather than type a friend code or search through a list of people you've played with. Do you guys agree? Do you guys hate my opinion? Tell me what you think!
I love cartoons. I love the wacky physics and hilarious visual gags. I love the style, humor, and ideas presented in them. Surprisingly though, I don't really watch anime. I just never got into it. I've watched a couple and I disliked them either for how overly serious it is, or how dramatic it is. I also dislike the style, as it's not wacky or cartoony as I like it. Also, some are too weird for my tastes. However, there is one anime that has stuck out to me and I continue to rewatch it to this day. That anime is...
Cory in the House.
Nah, I'm kidding! It's Kirby: Right Back at Ya!.
I can sense the hatred and pitchforks and comments coming my way already. Let me explain.
Kirby is one of my favorite franchises, and when I first heard that there was a cartoon for it (which was quite a while ago), I was ecstatic. I love cartoons and Kirby, and putting them together is a dream come true!
I watched almost all the episodes. I didn't even realize it was anime because of how goofy it was! It wasn't too serious, and it reminded me of the animations I love. Sure, the 3D animation might've made you cringe at times or there was a couple animation mistakes from time to time, but I pushed those flaws aside because I had fallen in love with the show. The character are so lovable. Even King Dedede, who acts like a huge jerk most of the show, is so much fun to watch because of how over the top he is and I love the voice acting for him in the American dub. The intro is so catchy in the American dub as well! I love the trumpets and the lead singer in it, and it's always stuck in my head. The finale was amazing! I may not love things that are too serious, but the finale blew me away! It was epic to watch and the perfect way to end it. I wish the Kirby games would reference this anime more or even bring a couple of the characters in it back!
"Titanica, your such a dunce! There are animes that are like the dumb cartoons you watch!" I hear your fingers slamming on the keyboard.
Well, the truth is, I haven't really watch much anime. I tried going on Crunchyroll to find something I liked, but none really fit me. Maybe I haven't searched how enough. That's why I am making this blog. Does anyone know an anime similar to Kirby: Right Back at Ya? If so, please let me know! I'd love to see it!
Just recently have I gotten myself into Tetris and now I am hooked to something else.
I just got Kirby Star Allies and I have fallen in love! Kirby is now number one on my priority list and I am rewatching the anime and replaying all the games!
If you have no idea what I'm talking about, let me explain. My profile picture was made in Garry's Mod and it is always changing. On the left is Mario, because I will always have a special place in my heart for him. On the right is a character that represents what I am addicted to at the moment. I previously had a bunch of tetriminos there to represent my new love for Tetris, but Kirby sucked them all up and has taken my love!
So, after Kirby has finished inhaling my time, what game will I fall in love next. Will I ever get to try Paper Mario and the Thousand Year Door? Will I revisit one of the games I've loved previously? Will I quit video games entirely? Who knows!? Find out on the next (probably not but soon) blog on Titanica's (Master of Shitposting)'s Blog!
So I tend to talk about real life issues and make stupid stories in my blogs. Only once have a actually used a blog to talk about a real occasion and that wasn't even real, it happened in Splatoon! So this time, I'm going to talk about something that INFURIATES ME and this story is completely true.
So yesterday (at the time of me typing this), I went to get a haircut. The line was extremely long, so I decided to kill some time while waiting by getting out my Switch and playing some Puyo Puyo Tetris.
As I was playing, a kid walked up to me and said, "So you're a gamer too?"
I was shocked by how unexpected it was, but I replied, "Uh, yeah? I mean, I've been playing video games for a long time."
"What are you playing now? Is that like a 2D Minecraft?" he asked as he glanced at my Switch.
"Uh, no. It's this action-puzzle game called Puyo Puyo Tetris. It's a crossover between Puyo Puyo, which I've doubt you've heard of, and Tetris. I'm sure you know what Tetris is, right?"
"Never heard of either. Sounds boring though. Puzzles games suck!"
That was the moment where I got extremely ticked off. How the f*** could this kid call himself a "Gamer" when he hasn't even heard of Tetris. Then he has the AUDACITY to say that the game sucks when it's a puzzle game. He's doing so many things that upset me. He's judging a game hasn't heard of (even though anyone who calls themself a Gamer should've as least heard MENTIONED) by associating it with other puzzle games. Unfortunately, I did let my anger take control of me.
"How could you possibly call yourself a gamer when you haven't even heard of Tetris?" I asked.
"Liking old, obscure games is not cool, dude! They're outdated and have bad graphics and are BORING!" he retorted.
I was infuriated. Enraged. I will filled with rage.
"There is so much wrong with what your saying, kid. First of all, retro games are what got video games to be as awesome as they are today. Second, graphics don't make a game much better. If you're playing video games for the graphics, you may as well stare at a painting or go watch a 4k video on youtube. Third, the older games are not boring. I doubt you've even touched a game that was made in the 80's and 90's. Super Mario Bros, Contra, The Legend of Zelda, Pac-Man, Half Life, and Tetris are ANYTHING but boring. They're classics, and if you think that you're logic is great logic to judge a video game, you shouldn't even consider yourself a gamer." I said.
The kid was shocked and backed away.
Hopefully I taught him a lesson. I may have gone a bit too far, but I couldn't help it. And this isn't even the first time this has happend. I hear children mocking Nintendo for how the Nintendo Switch does not have 4k graphics, or that Mario is for babies. It infuriates me and I can only hope that the term, "Gamer" does not refer to these idiotic losers.
Don't take this too seriously, my blogs are usually over the top and meant to be taken with a grain of salt.
So my last blog got some negative reception, and I will admit that I was thinking more about myself than what I was writing. So today, I will be making a sequel to my most liked blog, "Ant Lives Matter."
Ant Lives definitely matter, and I have brought light and love into their small lives, but now that my work there is finished, I need to give my love to another. That is why Titanica (Master of Shitposting) is here to say...Plant Lives Matter.
"Titanica?! Are you insane?! First you make a blog about Ant Lives and now PLANTS?! Blogs are meant to be used for venting and getting your feelings out, not protests for shitposting and discrimination," I hear your fingers typing. Well first of all, listen to my reasoning about how Plant Lives Matter. Second, how often do you actually see people venting on a blog on GBAtemp? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Plants are the backbone to all living creatures. Sure, water and the sun are essentials too, but they're almost completely useless without plants. Plants produce fresh and clean oxygen for animals. They take in Co2 (which we breath out) and use it to make food (along with sunlight and water). As we become more and more sucked up into technology, more and more smoke is produced. We're most likely going to die out, but plants are slowing down the process!
So plants give us free oxygen for our nasty Co2. Sounds like a Win-Win to me! But it doesn't stop there. Some creatures NEED plants to survive, such as bees! Some eat the plants as a part of their healthy diet. Some plants even grow foods that WE eat! Say bye-bye to all the precious fruits and veggies you love so much as plants die out!
"But Titanica!" I hear you screaming into your monitor. "How are plants dying out, you faggot?! There are trillions of them growing right now! Farmers and Gardeners and Scientists grow them all the time too!"
Well, my angry reader, plants are dying the same way ants are! We BUILD OVER THEIR HOMES! We take the land and build our silly houses on top of them and get rid of all life except ourselves!
"Plants can still grow! We need room to survive and so do all the other animals," I hear you talk back.
Well, all the other animals are able to coexist with the plants and use them as allies or homes! Humans on the other hand? Nope! Kill them all! Let's grow some artificial grass so it looks natural!
As the human population grows more and more, the amount of land available shrinks and shrinks. Eventually, we'll have to take all the homes of the animals that many are desperate to protect for our own needs, unless we wish to live outside.
This brings me to my final point. I don't understand why there are so many people who want to protect the animals and go "vegan" when they are ignoring my points. Plants matter just as much, if not, even more than animals! They live too, and are essential to all of the living creatures (well almost) to survive! We need them and must treat them with respect. They not only keep us and everyone else alive, but they help make this planet look and feel beautiful and are wonderful organisms. So next time you are outdoors or going somewhere, stop to smell the roses!
Don't take this blog too seriously, it's not meant for serious debate and should be taken with a grain of salt. Thanks for reading!
When people don't read my blogs!
I released a blog that I am extremely proud of. It's called, How to NOT be a Normie. It took a lot of time to create, and I was sure that people were going to enjoy it. Instead, not a single person replied or liked it. Instead, it was overshadowed by the crappy blogs and shittyshitposts. I put so much care and love into my blogs and to see it all go to waste and fall to a blogs typed in 2 seconds, it hurts. Ex: Compare this blog to my other ones: https://gbatemp.net/entry/smok-wed-evri-dey.14392/
I see this with other bloggers too! People just ignore the well written and awesome blogs to get the ones with the most [memes].
You know what, I guess I should try what everyone is doing. Here's my latest blog: HywWhy log@m paaul is gr9
Ykn know lo@gam opaul?Q Hem best yoo tube r.
soubctribe to l my mein crap dyoo tub channl
Perfect! Now I will get tons of great feedback and dank memes! I am so talented!
PLEASE READ BEFORE REPLYING
Hello, Titanica (Master of Shitposting) here. Today, I will be guiding you on how to NOT be a Normie.
Now before we talk about being an "Anti-Normie", we need to know what a Normie is. If you do not know what a "Normie" is, then you're most likely one. However, that may not be true. You may be an "Outsider" in your heart. Or, you may not care much about terms like this. Whatever your situation is, we need to figure out if you are a normie.
A normie is someone who likes their information "spoon fed" to them, and they try to fit in with everyone else. They may often uses "memes" (if you don't know what a meme is, you really shouldn't be on the site and instead should be researching this stuff) the are stale/old. Being a normie is not a bad thing. It's completely Normal! Normies usually do these things:
1. Fit in with the crowd, have the same public opinion as everyone else, cast out anyone with different opinions or interests.
2. Find a meme that everyone else is using and use it as well.
3. Go with the trends.
4. Call other people Normies.
Now, before I continue on, let me discuss that last one. If you call someone else a normie with no evidence at all, you most likely are one. Being a normie may put a negative reputation on you, so you may be desperate to throw that name onto someone else. This will make your situation worse. If you call someone a normie after seeing them you stale memes and disagreeing with your interests or opinions because it's not the same opinion as someone else, then they're most likely a normie. I don't consider myself a normie for saying "you most likely are a normie" earlier, because I'm using facts to state whether you are one or not.
Some people a normies by heart, and there really isn't anything you can do about it. However, if you're strong enough, you may be able to live more freely and be less caring about everyone else. You may become an outsider!
An Outsider is someone who sticks out from the crowd and has their own ways of living. They may do things that may seem "strange" to normies, but they live more freely than normies and don't give 2 f***s about what everyone else thinks. They stick with their opinion and stick to memes that haven't been used by normies.
Now, if you're a normie but wish to change your ways, try doing the following:
1. Don't call someone a normie unless it is completely necessary.
2. Ignore the trends and enjoy what YOU enjoy
3. Treat other opinions with respect, no matter has messed up they are.
4. Don't blast memes in school. Just don't.
5. Respect yourself as much as you respect others.
6. Don't worry about what other people think!
If you are an Outsider, then welcome! If you are a normie, that's ok. Just try to change your ways. You don't need to be popular to be awesome.
"This Way," I screamed to one of my comrades, Mushroomy.
Mushroomy turned his head. He was covered in enemy ink. I could see the desperation in his face.
He came swimming towards me and hid behind the wall with me.
"They have taken the middle...," Mushroomy panted.
"No...I thought we had this match in the bag!" I gasped.
Mushroomy set down his Dynamo Roller and said to me, "We have one minute left on the clock. We might as well give up now before we get ourselves splatted..."
I was in disbelief. How could Mushroomy say this to me?! He has splatted so many people and is one of my fiercest teammates, how could he give up on us?! We've won on Moray Towers before, how could this be any different?
Shocked, I yelled at him, "We can't surrender! We must fight to the-"
I didn't get to finish my sentence because one of our enemies (who holding a .52 Gal Deco) spotted up behind the wall and came swimming to us.
"Mushroomy! We need to move! An enemy is coming to splat us!" I screamed.
It was too late though. The enemy appeared out of the orange ink and shot 2 globs of ink at Mushroomy.
I heard Mushroomy cry in agony. It was the worst sound any squid could hear, and I couldn't stand hearing the pain.
As soon as the second glob of ink hit, my dear friend exploded and his ghost flew up into the air.
Suddenly, so many emotions rushed into my system. Qualms. Rage. Hatred. Depression. My closest ally has been splatted in front of my own eyes.
The enemy looked at me and began to laugh. I realized I had dropped my Blaster and that my face was red.
From that day forward, I would have an extreme hatred for anyone related to that team. I would brutally murder them the second I got. I will make them PAY for destroying the only person that gave me hope.
The enemy splatted me as well with his weapon and I was left watching him squidbag me.
If you have been paying attention to my profile picture/avatar, you know that there has always been an Inkling next to Mario. Well now, Splatoon is the new old. Ever since I got my hands on Puyo Puyo Tetris, my interest for the blocky puzzle game has increased. I cannot stop playing it and Splatoon is now my new Rhythm Heaven (I was addicted to the Rhythm Heaven franchise for a while until I gave it a rest). The tetriminoes have crushed the Inkling and are now setting the way to...I dunno, fun!
Who knows what I will get addicted to next? Will it be back to Splatoon? Will I finally get the time to start playing Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door? Will I just throw out video games completely and playing Monopoly? Who knows?! Find out on the next (probably not next but soon) entry of: Titanica's Blog!
DRAGONBALLVINTAGE likes this.
[Please read my first blog entry before reading this one]
And over...And Over...
Until something pops up.
SciresM has announced CFW THIS SUMMER!
YES! MY WAITING PAID OFF!
The road is not much longer, the light is-
"Further News Updates will be blocked until you Update"
My struggle to not update was evolving into a desperation. How can I NOT download Eshop games, or play online, or do ANYTHING?!
I swallow another Sweaty Icebreaker and start a cry.
A cry for help..
This blog is meant to be a joke. It is mocking people who have no patience for Switchbrew.
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