dRaWiNg aNd ChEaP CoMeDy iS My PaSsIOn

  • JuanMena

    The Real True Truth

    What happened yesterday was nothing but a terrible joke (idea) badly executed.
    I joked with the idea of having 9 warnings (being about to get banned is something that atteacts me) and I still want to reach 9 warnings on Inappropriate Behaviour which only means that I will achieve that by offending people.

    Dinoh told me that he could rise it for free and I dared him to do so.
    Then yesterday I wished him a Happy Birthday and we ploted the whole "This Site has Some Really Immature and Biased Mods" thing... just to see everyone else's reaction.
    But I not just copy pasted everything as everyone has done before. I added my personal touch by bitching about real reasons for real warnings.

    I never intended you guys to get the joke anyways and I lol'ed a lot with some people's responses.
    Some were unexpected to be honest.

    Then x656942 came and joined the party but I forgot to actually warn him that everything was a joke agreed between Dinoh and I... and maybe Flame?

    So yeah...

    Everything I said yesterday is a joke.
    So this is aimed at @godreborn as I feel he took it too personal:
    Dude, I've noticed your activity on my recent blog posts. I'm thankful for that, and I would never ditch anyone on it's preferences.
    -end of message-

    As a matter of fact; I'd like to clarify and reveal my gender and the pronoun I go by now:

    I've recently found myself way too confused with my gender. I've always liked women and I don't know if I'm a Man or a Lesbian :unsure:
    I decided to exercise to keep my testosterone levels above my lesbian hormones but no matter what I do, women still attracts me.
    And I don't go by He or It... now I'd like you to call me:

    So from now on refer to me as your MASTER and I want you to respect my decision and my personal feelings, otherwise I will have to report your behavior towards me as Genderphobic.


    @DinohScene: I would never make fun of you for being gay. You're my favorite pussy...cat.

    Best regards everyone, thanks for reading and understanding me in these hard times of my personal life.
    Azerus_Kun and Scott_pilgrim like this.
  • JuanMena

    Getting Fit: Day 2

    Well holy shit! It took quite a long time to get recovered from my "first session".
    It sucks. If my body continues like this, I'm going to have half the time to loose weight.

    To anybody interested enough to read this: I'm re-starting to exercise in order to loose weight.
    If you're fat, you're fat, that's it. And I'm fat! (strangely only for 4 kilos or 8 pounds)
    I took a picture of myself a week ago (before exercising) in order to make a comparison until the last day of exercise.
    By "last day" I mean the last day until my goal date ends... which is around March 5 or something like that if not earlier.
    It's going to be interesting... and it certainly adds a bit of pressure to get fit QUICKLY!

    So, It's been raining over here for two days now, and given the situation, I don't want to risk myself getting sick with stational flu, or even coronavirus.
    Supposedly I was going to exercise yesterday, but the day was like this since I woke up, up till 7pm or so:

    Something quite strange though, is that my body didn't healed in 3 days... and that just tells me how terrible my condition is.
    I didn't even made impactful or stressful exercises. Just cardio with basket by free-shooting from as far as I could for as long as I could (for about 1 hour if not less than that) and then I used the machines on the "Outdoors Gym" that's inside my condo. Mainly used two "machines", one for the back muscles and the other for the arms.
    My goal is to get slim/thinner in the Waist and at the same time gain volume on my Back&Shoulders and Ass.

    Sidenote: the Ass has many words in Spanish, so I'm unable to find a proper word to refer to my bottoms :shy: It can be refered to as: Cola, Nachas, Nalgas, Pompas/Pompis, Culo and Trasero

    I'm not aiming for Biceps, or Chest, or Legs... you know... the obvious parts where a man would be proud of pumping ot strengthen.
    My goal is to fit in old pants and at the same time, stylize my body shape by (trying) to get back a V shape.
    I'm not sure if I've grown in height (but to the sides I have :rofl2:) so it... MAYBE still fits me, but I'm not able to button-em up to my waist lol.
    But I'll now talk about the "routine" I've done twice now.

    We (Théo and I) arrived at the Basket Court... or simply called: Canchas (literally Court)
    And I decided to "play fetch" with Théo, as a warm up.
    People in my conde are literally the filthiest people you could ever possibly find. The Canchas are a mess, and those machnes have been broken 3 times now thanks to stupid neighbours.

    So... I warmed up with Théo by walking a bit with him and playing around with his ball... but...
    I don't know if he's dumb or way too smart, but he never retrieves the ball.
    I always have to walk over to the other side of the Canchas to kick his ball once again, and he runs to it, but then I have to walk over there just to kick it once again to the other side...
    I mean... by all means sure he's having fun, but it gets old after 5 minutes.

    Tired of his routine, I told him:

    Alas, he didn't... and I just simply carried him back home and left him indoors.
    I grabbed my Basketball, some water and gloves to improve my grip (my ball is well over 15 years now and it's fucking smooth, so it slips easily off my hands)
    I once again went to the Canchas and I was like: HEY MOTHERFUCKER, LET'S TRY TO BEAT OUR PREVIOUS DISTANCE RECORD.
    Which is about 12 metters of distance from the "basket" (hoop) to the place where I'm shooting from.
    Each square is 3m by 3m... so I can shoot from the fourth square without jumping or throwing the ball with my arms. I just lift the ball above my head, and I use my hands and fingers to throw the ball, but never the arms.
    This is because I'm throwing with my Shoulder and Back muscles and not with the Forearm and Biceps. When I notice that my ball is not reaching the hoop by throwing it with my shoulders and hands, I move to using my arms for I can reach a farther distance by throwing with them. Once I notice that I'm unable to reach the hoop not even with the arms, I move one square closer to the hoop and I repeat the cycle (Throw with Shoulders and Hands then with Arms, move a square closer, repeat) until I get tired.
    Fun fact: I'm just 2 inches lower than the frame of the Goalie.
    LOL Don't mind my fucking face, sun was burning my eyes :rofl2:

    So after I get tired of free-shooting, I move out to the "Outdoors Gym" machines.
    I always start with this one which is used to stimulate back muscles:

    The way it works is like this:
    You sit in there, and you lift your arms to reach the leevers. Then, you push down to lift yourself up. So you're lifting your own weight!
    Of course is easy for me to reach the leevers... but it's hard to make a proper set because of my current condition.
    So I'm "cheating" the exercise because I know I'm unable to make more than 20 reps.
    The way I'm cheating is like this:
    You use explosive energy to pull yorself up. Then, you tense all your muscles to lower yourself back to the original position.
    This ensures muscle failure quickly with very little reps. So 20 for me is enough to get decent results on strength... but not volume.
    Once I've conditioned my body for strenght, I will aim for volume, and that conditioning is probably going to take over a month or so.
    Which is why my exercise routine consist in 1 day of exercise, 1 day of resting... and so on and so forth.
    Alas, the rain prevented me to go outside yesterday, so I've just lost one day.

    After I see that I can't properly tense my muscles anymore, I move to this "machine" to work on my shoulders and brachialis:
    These are used to strengthen your chest area and the arms.
    It's intention is to put yourself between each tube, place your arms on each one, and lift your own weight with them.
    So, what I'm doing is that I stand ON THE SIDE OF THE TUBES, and with a PRONATION GRIP I place my hands at shoulder level. Then I stretch my legs so I hang off of the tube at a 45° angle. And then I lift myself up. It's kind of an inverted push-up.
    BUT I don't only do whatever reps I can. No.
    With my right arm, I lift my right side of the body FAST, and then I tense my arm muscles and low myself down SLOWLY AND AS TENSE AS I CAN.
    Then I do the same with my left arm.
    Then I do the same with both arms.
    Then I just repeat the cycle until muscle failure.

    With PRONATION GRIP I'm aiming for the Brachialis muscle wich will pump up my bicep, so no need to aim for biceps for now (no weight lifting)


    There's a huge difference in which muscles are used and reached depending on how you hold/grip.
    Right now I'm focused on PRONATION GRIP and ONLY PRONATION for now.

    So, this is my routine for now. I see that I'm unable to make reps and sets. So I'm conditioning my body at first to reach that point. After that I can go fucking crazy with my routines.

    As for diet: I've found that I suck at them. So I'm going to eat whatever I have at home, but I will aim for proteins (Eggs, Meat, Milk, Cheese, Rice, Beans, Tortillas and other stuff) BUT NO SODA OR COLD TEAS OR OTHER THAN PLAIN WATER

    Thanks for reading! Have a nice rest of your day!
    Orangy57, Azerus_Kun and zfreeman like this.
  • JuanMena

    Words don't come easy

    Words don't come easy.png

    It's been raining since yesterday here in my place.
    And today was going the second day of exercise, and if it before was cold (0C° / 32F° max) yesterday and today has been colder thanks to rain.
    I don't want to expose myself to getting sick again, as I've just dealt with (coronavirus?) this last december.
    So, as I couldn't go out to do my stuff, I sit on my chair and I started painting something.
    I decided to go with my Oil Painting brush set.
    What makes it different from all the other sets I've made, is that it blends as you paint on top of other colors.
    BUT I've found a certain "configuration" (within Sketchbook Brush Settings) that allows me to use pressure sentivity to create funky stuff like: Blending when there's little pressure and Painting when you press harder.
    It's fun to play around with, as I don't have to sample middletones. As a matter of fact, I rarely sample tones and I use color theory to darken or lighten tones.
    So, the outcome with these brushes is never how I intend-em to be, and that's nice. It's a bit unpredictable. Fun in few words... different in essence.

    I later found that this "sketch" started to resemble a long time ago girlfriend I had when I was a mere child. Fun story, she and I met yet again when we were teenagers in drawing and painting classes imparted by Alberto León. I'm talking about 2012... so that was a long time ago.

    Of course the resemblance is not absolutely perfect (if I might say something about her -María- is the fact that when I saw her back in 2012 she looked a lot like Kat Dennings)
    She was gorgeous... and I'm happy to think once again about her.

    I will later try to do some Kat Dennings studies to actually paint a portrait of Maria later in the future.
    Maybe when I get old... like... super old...

    But right now I'm happy with this brush set. I updated textures and this is a test. As always :blush:
  • JuanMena

    Getting Fit: Day 1

    My body hurts.
    Yesterday... I began with my routine.
    It includes cardio, callisthenic and a bit of stretching.

    Basketball: I did 1 hour of free shots. I've always tried to beat my record in distance from where I can score a shot.
    Yesterday I reached 12m. That means that I can score a shot from 12 m of distance.
    Free shots improves shoulder strength. And shoulders are a focus of mine this time.
    Also, lots of explosive energy are used while free shooting.
    So lots of calories are used.

    Callisthenics: It means that I use my own body weight to exercise. I focused on my back muscles, triceps and brachial muscle.
    My routine consisted in Muscle failure and not so much on reps or sets.
    Considering I got really tired after basket... I couldn't do more than 20 reps of each exercise.
    What I did was that I used a machine where you sit and with levers suspended in the air you make a pronation movement to lift yourself, carrying your own weight.
    The most important thing here is the way you let your weight push you down.
    Tensing the muscles while slowly going back is key to achieve Muscle Failure with very little reps.
    This means that for instance, dumbbells with very little weight can help you develop muscle without the need of carrying more weight.
    Am I explaining myself?

    I also did some reps in a machine that consists of two horizontal hand rails. I grabbed one in pronation position, placed my hands at shoulders level, and let myself go down while carrying my own weight with the aid of the tubes.
    Then I raised myself towards my hands and slowly let myself down to assure Muscle Failure quickly.

    I didn't counted reps for my overall condition isn't good.


    My routine worked and I won't change it.
    I will try to record it next time so you too can do it at home.
  • JuanMena


    Look at this:
    Not going back to CRT's anymore.
    This looks nice, picture is straight ALWAYS and lag is virtually inexistent.
    Scott_pilgrim and Azerus_Kun like this.
  • JuanMena

    Only 10 WEEKS to get fit!

    Change of plans, I only have 10 weeks to get fit!

    God damn! I should've started before! But I've decided to start tomorrow.
    So, since my last Blog entry, where I proposed myself to get healthy and fit in order to wear decent pants (old pants where I fit no longer LOL) I got overconfident with time, and in my mind I was going to consume as many carbs and proteins as I could in the first half of January.

    This means that I've been eating what's available at home.
    It includes at least 2 fried eggs each day.
    A plate of "vegetal" protein (Beans, Rice, Lentils and Green vegetables + Pecans, Walnuts, Almonds and Peanuts) and of course, lots, and lots of carbs such as Ham, Sausages, Tortillas, Candies and Sweetened beverages.
    I was starting slow in order to build up a condition once again (FYI I can't bend down to pick up stuff without groaning :rofl2:)
    But I'm not necesarily fat, at least... not excesively.
    I just have a small bit of what Google Translates as dewlap, a belly that won't let me button up my jeans, and probably oversized cheeks for my neck :rofl2:X2

    Hmm... I know I promised photos, but I was going to start with them in the first half of January (when I was going to start excercising) but that changed suddenly! And so I have to change my planned excercise and diet routine which was going to be a bit lax to be honest. Nothing too impactful and routines were going to be more cardio than anything.

    So... let's start with this photo I've taken some minutes ago.
    It shows my current weight... and I'm surprised to be honest! I thought I was on 100 kilos at the very least. (220pounds)
    But I see I'm on 89kilos(196pounds) which is healthy for someone my height. Although the ideal is 85 kilos(187pounds). So I'm overweight just by 4 kilos! (only 8pounds!)
    This means that my belly and dewlap is thanks to all the sweetened beverages I've been consuming since december. Lots of soda!

    I guess I'll have to drink more plain pure water for now on (No flavouring additives!) and NO SODA FROM THIS DAY ONWARDS! Or at least, no more than 2 glasses... BUT THAT'S IT! NO MORE THAN THAT! :ha:


    Tomorrow I will start with Cardio and I will try to explain briefly the what I do and how I do it in order to loose weight.
    Then, I will try to make more heavy excercises to improve muscle growth. Still aiming for that long gone V shape I used to have. :sleep:
    The goal is to be like this: " / " means " TO "

    Weight: 75/78kilos or 165/171pounds (currently 196pounds)
    Chest and Back circumference (with shoulders included): 140cm/150cm or 55in/60in (currently 52in)
    Waist: 90cm or 35in (currently 42inches)

    I'm a bit confused here. Accordingly to my knowledge, a waist bigger than 100cm is considered to be FAT/OVERWEIGHT and yet I'm currently 4kilos over the limit...
    This could mean that nearly all my fat is getting stored on my waist. So, I'm going to try to fix that by doing Russian Twists more than anything else.
    So there's that :unsure:
    Funny how different bodies reserves fat in different parts huh? ^_^

    But whatever!
    As promised, I will be sharing progress every 15th and 30th of each month... that leaves me with about 5 blog entries to get fit! :wacko:
    Well... today is Jan 13th... so of course won't have much progress in just two days. So I'll share my first progress entry this 30th :ha:

    Will I achieve my goal? I don't know. :creep:
    I'll have to change a lot of my current life style, and that not only means changing my diet, but also stop spending more time drawing as I spend most of the day sitting in my chair. :blush:
    Hmm... I had planned not draw or paint that much anyways :sad:

    EDIT: p1ngy is right. For some reason I forgot that I was measuring my chest and back circumference with Shoulders included.
    Without shoulders my circumference is 45in.
    godreborn, Patxinco and Azerus_Kun like this.
  • JuanMena

    Only 5 months to get fit.

    There's going to be an important event in 5 to 6 months from here.
    I've got to the personal task to get fit by that date.
    This isn't something personal, so I'd like to talk about it.

    So, I'm currently 6'2" and I weigh like 95kilos or 210pounds... and it's all thanks to the diet I've had since last year's September.
    So, we (my family) have lots of celebrations that beggins in September and ends on December 31st.

    For one, we have Mexico's Independence Day on September 15th, and then we have my Sister's Birthday on the 19th.
    In October we have Day of the Death in the 30th till November 2, and then my other Sister's Birthday on November 8th.
    After that comes Christmas and then New Year.
    All of these days Includes a fancy dinner and a cake and more often than never, chocolates, candies and desserts.
    As for food, most of the times we opt for Pizza (Jumbo size, about 17inches in size), Fried Food like Gorditas, Quesadillas and Tacos, lots of Bread, Soda...
    As you can see, Carbs and all kinds of Flour :rofl2:

    As you (might) know, I don't celebrate my birthday, so we could as well start at August on my special day... and even then, we could actually begin the feasts in July on my papa's birthday.

    For the record, in last year's April/May, I was on 180 pounds... so I've gained some weight since then.

    Of course, there's no one to blame but me, for I can eat 6 eggs just on the breakfast, up to 20 tortillas and a full plate of frijoles with that.
    As you might be guessing, I do eat a lot on a normal day... or sometimes I might go to the opposite extreme and I would stop eating for 6/7 days (my personal record is 7 days, but I rarely achieve that, most of the times I've done it, I can last 6 days)

    I literally started on January the 1st by taking Théo for his occasional walk in the mornings.
    I've been running with him... although I can last for a few minutes (at max 15 and running slowly) just to spend a couple hours kicking a ball for my dog's pleasure. I think it's called Fetch... although he never retrieves the ball so that means I actually have to walk over ther to kick his ball again, and the cycle repeats itself.
    I've found yesterday that I've completely lost the ability to make Squats, Abdominals and Push ups.

    In my prime (2015-2016) and even before that (2008-2012) I would actually do over 300 abdominals in less than 5 minutes, over 80 Squats (while carrying a weight of 28kilos on my arms) and nearly 5 push-ups (I've never been able to) so I opted for weight lifting to get bigger arms and an "ab wheel" to exercise my back by doing over 100 reps.
    And as I'm taller than the rest of the Mexican people, fitting in a bus is almost impossible (not even standing, let alone in a sit) so everyday I would walk from Highschool to Home and that meant a 6k walk from the door of my school to home's... from Monday to Friday for 3 years.
    I used to do that walk in just 30min by the last months of highschool, so walking everyday kept me fit even if I ate a lot (funny part, I eat EVEN MORE when I exercise) and stopped doing exercises.

    So... that man is long gone. I used to have a nice V-Shape, with broad shoulders and back and a slim waist followed by thick thighs and slim legs. Man oh man (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤ :ha:

    I still can recall the "theory" behind exercising, so I know how to do different exercises deppending on what I want.
    If I want to define muscle but not get stronger... a.k.a "Getting Fit", then I would do different exercises than if I am looking for Volume or Strenght.
    In this case, the goal is to fit in a suit, so I need to "get fit" (thinner, slim) and I want to add volume to my back to get my V-Shape back... and I'd like to get a bigger ass to compliment the shape.

    The reason for all of this is because I've been unable to find pants that fits me because of my height.
    And when I do find pants high enough for my legs, it has a space to fit at the very least 2/5 personas.

    I'm not ashamed to share my progress
    , and I will be sharing some photos / videos of my current status, body shape, routines and diets every 15th and 30th until may/june.

    Thanks for reading! Have a nice rest of your day!
    Let's get healthy together!
  • JuanMena

    First Painting of the Year!

    This is so exciting!
    Just 2 days of the new year and already made a nice advance on my paintings!

  • JuanMena

    First Drawing of the Year!

    I woke up at 1:30-something in the morning... and I literally forgot that it's a new year. My oh my! Is it just me? Or is the Earth taking way less to go around the sun?
    Anyways... It's believed that the older you get, the faster you perceive time... and it's scientifically proven that the farther you're from Earth's Gravity, the slower Time will affect you... so Tall people such as me gets old super tiny miny slower than short people.

    Hmm... yes, colored pencils. I don't have many, and the ones I have are Scholar Grade.
    The brand? Pelikan.
    The experience? My oh my, even though they're Scholar Grade pencils, they blend so, so easily. Even with my sketchbook's paper (which is nearly transluscent) they blended EVEN BETTER than Prismacolor's pencils!

    Prismacolor went to shit since they started to produce Colored Pencils in Mexico's factories. They fucking suck ass. Don't fucking buy them :teach:

    I felt like drawing with Colored Pencils.
    I looked for a pretty girl on my Image Archives and found this gorgeous woman.
    Now... my ability with colored pencils sucks! This is the result of working more digitally than traditionally.
    But whatever! I like it and it was lots of fun!

    Here's the Scanned Version:


    It's missing it's light tones, which is kind of a golden-ish orange... sadly I'm missing that particular color amongst my pencils :unsure:
  • JuanMena

    Last Year's Fun Story

    Hi there!
    So... end of the year...
    Hmm... I'd dare to say that the date today offers a nearly metaphysical meaning to some people.
    It's common for regular folks with regular lives and average intelligence to make rituals to end and start a new year. For instance, the classic:
    "wEaR ReD UndeRwaRe" to find love next year...
    I'm not very fond of these (or any) holiday. To me it is what it is, just like birthdays: Another day that I grow older. That's it.

    Fun Story time:
    A week ago, we received the new that my aunt and cousins got sick. They did the Covid test and they're positive!
    My mom has been talking with my aunt (they're sisters, duh) and momma says that my aunt and cousins are having the same symptoms we had some weeks ago!

    You know what's funny? We got diagnosed with Pharyngitis and most importantly; we got Covid tested and we were negative to it!
    But why do we had the symptoms of Covid though? For instance, our temperature never went down of 37°C for over 4/5 days, we lost sense of smell and taste, body pain, headaches... but we were breathing fine, we didn't had chest pain (I have a heart disdease, so me having pain on my chest is nearly an everyday thing) and to me, those symptoms sounds like Covid.
    That's kinda scary... I don't know what to think, there's some ideas crossing my mind right now:

    • We had Covid and got misdiagnosed.
    • We didn't had Covid but we did had an extremely strong Pharyngitis.
    • We were lucky if we had Covid.
    • We're lucky we had Pharyngitis.
    • Maybe we had a variant of Covid?

    It's so... I don't know what to say... well... Strange? Funny? :unsure:
    It's certainly a very interesting end of the year.. I mean... I survived against all odds... I'm starting to believe that I'm frickin immortal or something.
    But still I want to say something nice, so I'm wishing you a very happy, full of accomplishments and fulfillment fucking new year.

    Please, stay safe! Best regards! Thanks for making me laugh for a whole year :P
    Azerus_Kun and Lostbhoy like this.
  • JuanMena

    Morning Practice - Strongest woman in the world

    Focusing on Back Anatomy and it's Gesture.

    Here's the "Abstraction" of the main pose.

    Here's the Sketch with defined shapes and some values:

    I suck at "Anime Style" so I'm going to change those F***ing eyes.
    alexander1970 and Azerus_Kun like this.
  • JuanMena

    Morning Practice - Anatomy and Gesture Studies

    As intended... every morning before painting a portrait I'd warm up my hand by sketching something easy and useful.
    Young me- (and I mean, 1 year ago) -would actually try to draw something and I wouldn't mind about anything at all... I just drew because I could. Soon after I found myself with over 300 sketches with no real purpose. That's a behaviour I wanted to leave in the past. So I promised to myself: "Everytime you do something, try to learn something or practice something useful"
    Often brings a quote Alberto Leon told me long ago: "Drawing is easy when you don't know how to do it"

    After thinking about it, I decided to prove myself that I can draw any pose I can think off convincingly, and so I started to focus more on Perspective, Anatomy and Gesture.
    Not so long ago, I decided to re-learn Anatomy and re-teach myself (it) by sketching characters I'm familiar with in order to ease the job.
    The less I can think about what I'm trying to draw (but not express) the more I enjoy drawing.

    So... I've found that I like to draw feet! As weird as that sound, drawing feet is something considered quite difficult to draw by many draftsmen.
    To me they're easy. I just focus on the major shapes and I draw the toes based on that shape. Then, perspective becomes easy and I can fake foot anatomy quite well. These feet are not perfect, but they serve the purpose of being recognized as such.
    Of course, focusing on feet allows me to do all kind of naughty poses, they add fun to the challenge of making feet interesting to watch.
    Besides, feet has a lot of expression and gesture.
    Drawing hands seems to be easy for me too... at least at certain angles. I rarely rely on my hands for reference.

    This is a study of another artist.

    This is a study of mine.

    After convincing myself that feet are interesting and fun to draw, I then started sketching something to practice back anatomy and I come up with this:

    "Triceps contracts, Brachialis stretches the Biceps. Deltoids pops out.
    Belly shows a bit of muscle while Thoracic Box defines the profile of body.
    Hamstrings stretches, knee blends in with the perspective, this part is bigger because of it.
    Butt has fat, so it folds"
    This is usually what I think of when drawing/practicing anatomy.

    I got carried over by the rendering on the face... so it looks weird with that hatching... but it looks nice without it... the only thing is that it looks way, way off without any value when the body has values to declare volume.

    TL;DR: I'm going to draw more feet.

    Thanks for reading!
    Have a nice rest of your day!
    Azerus_Kun likes this.
  • JuanMena

    Morning Practice - A bit of a tootorial too!

    Ever since I got sick, I've been having troubles sleeping.
    I can stay awake for over 24 hours, regardless of how tired I am, I'm only sleeping for a couple hours. Sometimes 3 at max... Today hasn't been the exception to that rule.
    So... Instead of lying on bed thinking stupid stuff or watching even dumber things on YouTube / Porn ... I got up, and decided to practice a bit of anatomy.

    As you might already know, I like to draw without using references. This is in order to force me to rely on visual memory of how things are made/constructed or how a character is like. Sometimes I might throw a reference for clothing, but I never copy anything unless I'm doing a portrait.
    This isn't important at all though...

    Usually, my drawing process starts with a very loose and rough sketch. Just figuring out things like Perspective, Pose, Likeness of character, Anatomy, Proportions, Symmetry...
    I call this step; Abstraction
    And even still, one has to know everything posted a few lines earlier in order to get a convincing sketch. Convincing in terms of realism.
    When I use "the" Abstraction, I don't worry too much about details and stuff. But I do place some "landmarks" of stuff like Anatomy or Clothing, or even the Eyes, which are important to recognize a character. Also, this step is crucial when deciding the overall size of the idea. I've found that 2400px x 3000px is enough to do "detailed" drawings without any noticeable lag, even when coloring.
    It's required a bit of skill and experience to visualize the pose and character in your mind and place it on "paper".

    It's pretty ugly, and rough. But what matters is to get the main idea done.

    After the Abstraction has been done, I then lower he opacity of my layer, and on top of it, I then start to define individual shapes of the Anatomy and Light and Shadow.
    Yet, even more experience is needed in order to visualize convincingly light and shadow as we're literally creating volume with the use of values in order to simulate light and shadow.
    At first is hard, specially if you've never painted portraits before.
    As I said in the beggining, I rely a lot on Visual Memory, and painting portraits has taught me to visualize light and shadow. I don't rely on Facial Anatomy too much in order to add light and shadow on faces. I usually would rely on Anatomy when doing expressions, but not so much for light and shadow.
    Any aspiring artist reading this, can take the following advice with all confidence: Do portraits before you start to draw from imagination.

    Later, once the face has got a decent amount of rendering, I procede with the Clothing, and then, I render Anatomy with the use of values in order to define each muscle's shape.
    I've always had troubles with the arms... not so much with Deltoids, Brachialis and Biceps, but with the many other muscles in the forearm section. They have so many fibers that it's hard for me to memorize.
    This is why I usually tend to draw characters I'm familiar with... because it becomes a bit less of a pain in the ass to study anatomy. And it's fun to come up with original art using favourite characters.
    It might not be perfect, but it gets the job done... and that job is PRACTICE WHAT I KNOW in order to identify my weaknesses.

    So, after all of that has been done, this is the result:
    Some people say that this is "detailed" when in fact, I consider it to be quite basic.
    There's not really much of a challenge for me here other than memorizing and drawing Anatomy from memory.

    Anyway... sidenote: Custom Brushes Story

    Not so long ago, I made this Custom Brush set that relies a lot on Textures.

    It has everything I'm currently using: Pencil, Shader, Blender, Eraser, Pen, Nib Pen, Airbrush, "Natural Bristles" Brush and 12 different Marker Brushes, each with a different paper texture.
    I'm so happy with it.
    Originally, the plan was to release my Custom Brushes under my name in order to contribute to the Sketchbook Community.
    But I realized that I've spent well over One and a Half year(s) creating these Custom Brushes...
    I ain't going to give that time for free!

    Thanks for reading! Have a nice rest of your day!
    Azerus_Kun likes this.
  • JuanMena

    Auguste Gusteau was right.

    Oh my gosh...
    I'm super happy :D

    I feel beat up, my body is tired, as when you go somewhere to stand in line for some hours, and the next day you feel strange and uncomfortable... but in a good way.

    Today has not been the exception... if something surprised me, is the fact that we had rain...
    Can you believe it? We're like 0°C and it's raining :huh:!
    For those, you fancy first world citizens... 0°C is when Snow and Ice is formed. So Imagine having that as your max temperature in a tropical country literally in the Equator line...

    One of the wonders of Decimal is the fact that 0°C means literally Ice and 91°C is when water boils under normal atmospheric pressure... and a typical warm day is 24°C...
    I still don't understand why the whole world can't agree on Centigrade instead of Farenheit :sleep: but whatever that's a rant for another day.

    Today I thought it was going to be more of the same... waking up, take my pills, getting punched by'em only to sleep some more... and I did :creep: BUT
    I also started to feel super hungry...

    So I got up with literally almost no force on my body (for not eating in over 12 or so days) and I washed a pot, some plates, spoons... and made a Soup.
    Nothing fancy :rofl:

    Just plain old boring soup that comes in individual packages.
    But whatever, I mean... I was still hungry, and I was going to eat it anyways... despite of not being able to feel taste or smell for more than 7 days...
    Then I remembered I had Toasted Bread, eggs, ham, cheese, onion, chillies... and aside of my soup, I also made me 2 French Toasts with some Fried Eggs (they were gorgeous) with a pinch of salt, pepper and some spices in order to feel something of flavour...
    Then I went for Dough Tortillas (not the Corn ones) and made me some Quesadillas with them.
    But I fried some pieces of pork ham, sliced some cheese, and used two slices of American Cheese and fried everything together inside the ham... just to get the cheese to melt inside the ham...
    The result, was toasted Pork Ham, with Gooey Yellow Cheese and White Cheese and I used that as my Quesadilla filling. It was crunchy on the edges, meaty on the middle and cheese was coming out of it :shy:
    Then I wanted to go a bit further, so I sliced Onions, Chillies, and Garlic... I then fried everything with Salt and Oregano. Once the onion got caramelized I used it to stuff my Quesadillas.

    Then, there I was... French Toasts, Quesadillas, Hot Soup...
    I took a spoon of my Soup... and I felt the most amazing taste ever. The kind of taste that brings you back in time to better days.
    I might not be handsome as Ego's...
    but this is exactly how it felt (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤

    Got super anxious and happy... so I took a bite of my french toast and I felt the gooey-ness of the yolk rolling to my tongue, and it too tasted amazing.
    Then, I took a bite of my chillie and onion filled ham and cheese quesadilla... and that was yet another ecstasy.
    I smiled !

    I have never, ever in my life enjoyed so much a simple plate of soup, eggs, ham... whatever...
    For that I'm grateful... this year, although quite late, is showing me that I mustn't take my food and my senses for granted anymore.
    Like... I can take some time to think:
    When was the last time I enjoyed food so much?
    Today, today was that day... and I want more of these days.

    EDIT: OMG made me Jamaica Water and it's simply amazing!​
  • JuanMena

    Vulnerability and The Sandwich Revelation

    I've been feeling awfully saddened, depressed and vulnerable like never bebore in my life. This is just to let it go out of my system and just to find a little bit of peace of mind.
    If you've read past blog entries, you might know by now that I'm a guy that has attempted suicide 3 times, that I think that playing with electricity and sticking my hand in bare cables is fun.
    This week hasn't been particularly good. I've been sick for over 7 / 10 days now, I really can't recall how many days I've been in bed.

    Fearing to have what I guess it's obvious to sound like... my parents went to the hospital two weeks ago and they went to a "Covid Cener" which are none other than regular hospitals filled with Covid patients. Literally, all the patients that are getting infected wiht it are being brought to my city's hospitals.
    There's been reports of people dying of other things, women giving birth on the streets outside hospitals because they're filled with Covid patients.
    My father, being the most affected by what's presumably a virus, got his lungs checked and they're clean. That was over 12 days ago... he's been home ever since, stuck with us and he says he's literally tired of not being able to go to work.
    Here in Mexico, temperatures are going crazy since late september.
    We've had temperatures ranging from -7°C to 0°C at max. So of course, getting sick with influenza, flu and other viruses alike is a everyday thing and quite expectedly, a normal thing to happen.

    My father got diagnosed with Pharyngitis, and apparently he transmitted it to us. Or at least that's what doctors told him. So he was sent back home under the suspicion of having Covid-19.
    Some days later, mom, sister and I fell ill.

    It started with a sore throath, some itching, coughing... fever for 3 days that never wen't down of 37°C and an overall feeling of being unconfortable in my own skin.
    As a matter of fact, everyone in my family have been kind of suffering the same symptoms but at the same time not.
    But something my mom, sis and I experienced recently is the complete lack of smell and taste senses.

    I got super alarmed, extremely sad and I feared for the well-being of my family.
    So I got curious and started to seek info about what other illnesses can cause the loss of these two particular senses.
    Turns out that a common flu with extreme consequencies can lead to the complete loss of both senses.
    Pharyngitis can cause it too.
    Influenza can cause it too.
    Basically, any respiratory infection that happens to attack the nose, can cause the loss of taste and smell senses, as taste and smell are often active thanks to the nose. If your nose is gone, basically your sense of smell and taste will be gone too.

    For 5 days, we barely ate because food tasted like nothing.
    And I think it's fair to say that being more worried of not knowing if we have it or not (Covid) completely messed up our psyche.
    My father insists that he's tasting and smelling just fine, just like any other day of the year.

    Me on the other hand, I could taste salty, sour and sweet flavours, but I couldn't identify what was giving each taste.
    For instance, I drank Apple Juice on Friday, and in my tongue it felt sweet but it didn't taste like Apple at all.
    I even tried to smell Bleach and I didn't felt the smell of it, although I could feel the smell of Fabuloso which is a multipurpose cleaner.
    My sister also lost her senses and she couldn't taste and smell anything at all even before mom and I got the same symptoms... but she says her senses are slowly comming back.
    Mom on the other hand, had it something like me. She could sense flavours but not identify what was giving the flavour.

    I found that one could make online tests to determine wheter or not one is infected with Covid-19... so I did one this monday in order to get hospitalized if required.
    The test has been designed by my government's health organizations and in order to take it, you have to leave your real info such as name, phone number, address, age, etc.
    It asked me the most obvious questions on the matter and honestly left me perplexed.

    Have you've been in contact with Covid-19 patients?

    Have you had Covid-19 before?

    Have you had fever above 38°C?

    Do you have head pain?

    Have you had diarrhea, vommiting or rash?

    Have you had problems breathing, purple lips/face, lost of colour in fingers?

    Do you have a congenital dissease?

    I've been waiting that call since Monday though...

    Lastnight... my sister and I went for some medicine... exactly Paracetamol + Ibuprofen to ease the symptoms we've been suffering. And we also bought some food... just bread, ham, mayo and cheese to make us some Sandwiches, but we didn't got too happy about it.
    We're eating just because we have to and not because we want to.
    So... sister made me a Sandwich, and so she did to my faher, my mother and one for her.
    Surprise surprise, all three of us (dad says he didn' lost his senses) felt the taste of mayo and ham.

    I literally began to cry and got a knot on my throath because to me, being able to finally taste something is literally the glory.
    It's a feeling I've never felt before and I don't know if it could be comparable to happiness or something like that.
    I'm not a particularly happy person. Little things in life makes me laugh and most of the times I'm dealing with depression.
    But yesterday was like a receiving a gift.
    So many things that we take for granted and that we don't know they're important until we lost them. I felt most vulnerable about life.
    It was a mix of feelings... between being reliefed, anxious, depressed, happy and particularly enjoying food one more time in over 10 days of not eating properly... I began to cry.

    This morning I drank a litle bit of Mango Juice and it too tasted like glory.
    I really cannot express how happy I am for being able to taste things once again. And this has boosted my confidence on whatever we're having, we're dealing with it just fine, and our bodies are responding well to it.
    We're slowly recovering from this awful dissease... which, for the record, and once again, we have no clue if what we're experiencing is Covid-19 or not. Because aside of us not being able to taste and smell for some days, we've never had other symptoms comparable to Covid-19 and we haven't got any worse. Besides, tests to determine wheter or not you have the illness are completely useless, because if you're positive, you're being sent home only to call for an ambulance if you feel worse.

    At times like this, when I'm feeling vulnerable, I literally start to believe in God, and I make small prayers hopping for the best. Scientifically, when a person looses it's own life control, it's more prone to believe in anything.
    This actually means that I've lost my own life control, and I began to pray to something I've never believed in.
    That just tells me how vulnerable I feel at the moment, and it sucks.
    I can't laugh at death... at least not as I used to.

    But something that I can't get out of my head is the following: How / Who the fuck infected us with Pharyngitis?
    What are the odds of that? Like, seriously, we've been using masks for over a year now... and we get this?
    Right now, I'm enjoying yet another ham and mayo Sandwich and I feel like crying again. It tastes so good.